Read this week’s Amateur Offerings collection and offer constructive criticism below, plus vote for which script you want to be reviewed!
TITLE: Blood and Sangria
GENRE: Comedy Horror
LOGLINE: After agreeing to visit his sister in Marbella, Spain, perennial loser Morgan Maloney realizes he has made the mistake of his life when his schizophrenic alter ego, the serial killing and out of control psychokiller– Mister Galloway – rears his ugly head.
WHY YOU SHOULD READ: Who wouldn’t enjoy a light hearted tale of love in the Spanish sun with a psychopath akin to Patrick Bateman, Don Logan and Ben from Man Bites Dog.
WHY YOU SHOULDN’T READ: Copious foul language, extreme gory violence, auto-eroticism, bondage, murder, infanticide, blood, guts and more foul language and death. – And yet I would be surprised if you didn’t laugh out loud while all this stuff is going on. If all the blue dialog, action and death was removed it is after all a love story and tale of sibling redemption and resolution and not just an aimless goriest. Please enjoy and don’t think bad of me for writing such a fantastically horrible gross out script – it is Mister Galloway who made me do it.
TITLE: Weekend Dad
LOGLINE: A down-on-his-luck, divorced father, fearing he and his son are growing apart, struggles to get his life together and compete with the new, larger than life, billionaire stepdad.
WHY YOU SHOULD READ: I just had my first child, a boy. Well, my wife actually had him. I was there when he came out. And participated when he was conceived. I barely remember either event due to lack of sleep. These babies are tough to get on a schedule. Anyway, I look at my son and hope he will be a good person. I look at him and hope we stay close and nothing will break our bond. I know I don’t have to worry about this for a while. I am one of his only sources for clean diapers.
TITLE: I Am Ryan Reynolds
GENRE: Comedy, Fantasy
LOGLINE: Ryan Reynolds’ marriage, career, and sanity are threatened by a plastic surgery treatment that allows anyone with $10,000 to look like him.
WHY YOU SHOULD READ: You read the title, you read the logline, and now you’re wondering if the author is: 1. a crazy person, 2. a huge Ryan Reynolds fan, 3. someone who needs to get out more, or 4. some combination of those three things. In any case, “I Am Ryan Reynolds” is a surreal Hollywood satire with an unlikeable protagonist and very specific casting possibilities. It’s like “Being John Malkovich” for the common man, “Multiplicity” but with different character names, and “The Player,” except almost entirely different. Also, the descriptive paragraphs top out at two lines in length, so at the very least, the script is a quick read.
GENRE: Animal, Drama
LOGLINE: After a chimpanzee’s community is driven from its territory in the African jungles by a rival tribe, he struggles to rise through social ranks and take back the territory once his.
WHY YOU SHOULD READ: No dreams. No flashbacks. No narration. No humans. No dialogue.
TITLE: Crash Backwards
LOGLINE: A happily married woman begins to question her sanity when she discovers a stalker may be her husband from another life. In her quest for the truth she must make a choice that could wipe out her existence.
WHY YOU SHOULD READ: I had this idea several years ago and have been “thinkubating” on it since then….About two months ago it all came bubbling out and I couldn’t stop writing until it was finished. — I love roller coasters in the dark. That’s what this is. It takes you on a jolting, hair raising ride in the dark, all while you try to guess the next turn. — This story is a total mind job that puts you in the seat of the protagonist. You learn as she learns. You experience right along with her never knowing what’s going to happen next. It twists and turns right up to the final reveal, then….well you’ll just have to read it to find out. Also, here’s a poster for the script.