Genre: Drama
Premise: Coming-of-age tale about a young man trying to find himself in New York City.
About: Allan Loeb is one of the hottest writers working today. He broke onto the scene with Black List favorite, “Things We Lost In The Fire” (which I’ve been told is a much better script than it is a movie), penned the surprise hit “21,” and most recently finished the job of one of the most sought after assignments in town, “Money Never Sleeps” (aka “Wall Street 2″), and he’s got like six other projects in development. The Only Living Boy In New York is unique in that it’s one of the only drama specs sold in the last 5 years that didn’t have any talent attached (translation: It was really f’ing good).
Writer: Allan Loeb


Like I always say, if you’re gonna steal, steal from the best. “Living Boy” is basically “The Graduate” meets “Great Expectations” with a pinch of “The Great Gatsby” thrown in for good measure. The coming-of-age stuffy upper-crust 20-something angsty tale in NY is likely to appall as much as it appeals since older folk tend to roll their eyes at insignificant “problems” us young men endure (“Oh, I missed work because I partied too late. What ever am I going to do?”). This attitude reached an all-time fever pitch during the successful run of “Garden State,” a movie “Living Boy” will no doubt be compared to. But while “Boy” definitely has its share of angst, its characters lift it up and beyond Zach Braff’s New Jersey opus. Things feel a bit more meaningful here. And I can attribute that mainly to Loeb’s excellent writing.

20-something Thomas lives in New York City. He’s best friends with a super-hot (in a hip alternative way) college chick named Mimi. In an ecstacy-inspired night of regret and stupidity, Mimi makes the mistake of granting Thomas an all-night sex-a-thon. As a result, he’s fallen hopelessly in love with her. Of course Mimi considers the night a monumental college-level mistake (boy did I have my share of those) and doesn’t see why Thomas can’t just get over it. Thomas spends a good portion of “Living Boy” wondering why a sweet decent-looking guy like himself can’t land a hot girl like Mimi.

That’s the least of his worries though. While wandering aimlessly through New York one day, he accidentally spots his asshole of a father kissing a woman that is definitely NOT his mother. The 30-something icy business woman, Johanna, is easily the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen. Thomas is furious. His mother is already on the verge of a mental breakdown and finding out that her husband is cheating on her would surely push her over the edge.

Rounding out the cast of characters is the mysterious W.F. Gerald (it even sounds like someone from The Great Gatsby), a 50-something “unmade bed of a man,” as Loeb puts it. The wise W.F. is always there to dole out his sage advice when Thomas needs it. And Thomas needs it in spades.

He begins following his father’s mistress and when he finally works up the courage to confront her, he demands that she stop seeing him. The woman, who seems not to know of these things called “feelings,” makes it very clear that both she and her father can make their own decisions and that Thomas has no say in the matter. She follows this by accusing Thomas of falsely approaching her – insisting that the only reason he followed her was because he wants her himself. Thomas is appalled at the suggestion and storms away.

Later on, at a swanky upper crust party, Thomas runs into Johanna separately from his father, and she proceeds to seduce him (for the sport of it, of course), taking him home and engaging in a wild night of animal sex. Thomas now finds himself in an affair within an affair…sort of… as he starts sleeping with the same woman that is sleeping with his father. That’s comfortable. Of course Mimi, playing off of Thomas’ new popularity with the ladies, suddenly changes her mind and decides that she wants a relationship with Thomas. But Thomas has long since fallen in love with Johanna, and now cares only that she dump his father so the two can be together alone…and not…with his father (your average 20-something dilemma).

The way Thomas weaves in and out of these storylines is humbling to say the least. Loeb is an incredibly gifted writer. One of the true marks of great writers is how they describe their characters, and Loeb doesn’t disappoint.
[scrippet]
…Mimi Pastori

wears a double dyed pink wife-beater that stops just short of her bumper sticker… the Chinese symbol of balance. She owns a temple of a body built of feminine mesa-morph and displays small diamond stud in her nose.

All of Mimi’s attempts to hide her beauty fail miserably.
[/scrippet]
Or the way they write dialogue…
[scrippet]
THOMAS
I think… I… August eighth. I think August eighth was real.

MIMI
It was amazing, Thomas, but it was just one night. We were both on ecstasy, I thought I was a pirate and I was vulnerable because Nick left… and it was just one night.

THOMAS
Well, I’m crazy about you.

MIMI
And I’m crazy about you. But–

THOMAS
Don’t say “as a friend.”

He pulled the words right out of her mouth…

MIMI
Why not, Thomas? Why is that so bad?

THOMAS
Because pretty girls like to recruit their rejections and call them friends.
[/scrippet]
Or just how they can describe something in such a way that you know exactly what they mean…
[scrippet]
Howard immediately looks around. This transparent look-through-you gaze that famous and extremely rich people do when they want to talk to someone more important.
[/scrippet]
The Only Living Boy In New York’s biggest strength is also its biggest weakness. We’re looking at a character study here. And because Loeb is so focused on these great characters, the story itself is minimal to non-existent. Which is fine. That’s par for the course in this genre. But “Living Boy” stops just short of feeling like something important. It doesn’t make you reevaluate your life the way a viewing of “The Graduate” does. It’s limited to the inter-connectivity of these handful of characters. But it’s a great handful. I wouldn’t mind scooping up a few of them and tossing them in my own screenplays. If you’re a fan of “coming-of-age” films, this is a must read. If not, I would still encourage you to check this out. But I can’t promise it’s going to knock your socks off.

[ ] trash
[ ] barely kept my interest
[x] worth the read
[ ] impressive
[ ] genius

What I learned: Take your time and describe your main characters people! Look at the way Loeb describes Mimi above. It takes time to come up with that. But it pays off. I know a lot of writers who would’ve gone with, “Mimi, 22, is artsy and hot.” I’m not saying I haven’t seen professional writers do this. I have. But you get so little time in a screenplay to convey the true essence of a character, and if you nail it the description, it makes things so much easier on you and the reader later on.

  • Lumi

    Why is it that everyone praises Loeb's scripts but when his scripts are made into movies they are barely decent or they just flat out suck. Is this a case of maybe Loeb is more of a gifted writer in the sense of been a novelist than say screenwriter?

    Because I know all the flowery prose in the word won't count for shit if it can't be translated well on screen. That's why a lot of novels fail as movies.

    And oh Carson I think you need to review LONDON BOULEVARD for the rest of the folks on the site, it was a great read. It starts off slow, but the third act was killer. Thanks.

  • Carson Reeves

    I'm definitely not a "flowery prose" guy. If the words don't mean something, I tune out. As for why his scripts don't work, who knows? Some people would argue that 21 worked. But you know what the development process is like. People come in, things start changing. Directors have ideas. It could be any number of things.

    I very well might have to read London Boulevard. People keep badgering me about it. :)

  • Anonymous

    Script link is for Danny Man Cave – not Only Living Boy.

  • Anonymous

    Script link leads you to Danny's man cave. Might need to changed the link Carson.

  • Carson Reeves

    Oops! Sorry. Changing it now.

  • Anonymous

    Great great read. I love Loeb's writing style like you Carson. Highly recommended!

  • terraling

    Maybe it's because I'm English, but that killer description of Mimi, the only bit I understood was she displays a diamond stud in her nose.

    Or maybe it's because I'm too old, in which case there is no hope…

  • JonnyAtlas

    I may have to read this script at some point.

    I agree with you about character description. Its one of those things I always look for in scripts (and focus on in my own).

    Loeb's description of Mimi is quality, but there is a single line that ties it together:

    "All of Mimi's attempts to hide her beauty fail miserably."

    Boom. Without that, it's a solid description of a character. That line, however, speaks volumes. It is not simply saying she is stunning. It gives us a massive glimpse into the depths of who Mimi is as a person. Through that one line we understand who she is and how she views herself (among other things). Truly a remarkably written sentence.

    It is lines like that we should all strive for in our writing.

  • Anonymous

    It's Allan Loeb, not Alan.

    I love what you do here, but you butcher the names of talent pretty frequently. It's Steve Carell, not Carrel. Will Ferrell, not Ferrel. If you review London Boulevard, it's Colin Farrell.

  • Anonymous

    Loeb is a good writer. I thought THINGS WE LOST IN THE FIRE was very good. But it stopped short of being great and that is why it wasn't a great movie. For a movie like that to really work, you have to go as deep as you can in the characters, and THINGS WE LOST failed to do that.

    Agreed re: LONDON BOULEVARD. It is so damn good. That is the way to create great characters in a commercial story.

  • Anonymous One

    Things We Lost is good, but not great and far short of TOLBINY. There is no doubt that this script is what made Allan's career. He'll tell you that himself.

    But for those who think this script came from pure inspiration without hard work, it took Allan fifteen years or so to make it overnight.
    He wrote a lot of scripts before he came up with and toiled over TOLBINY.

    And I agree that this script has more than just a compelling story. The prose are a great part of enjoying the read. But "flowery" is the wrong term. I'd called it powerful prose.

  • Anonymous

    Yes, flowery is the wrong word. William Monahan and Eric Roth use A ton of prose in their scripts which makes the read fantastic (of course the prose has to be good for the read to be good). I use prose a lot too. For me, writing is writing and there are far less rules to screenwriting than people think. You can put music cues, camera direction and prose in there if it works. If you write great prose, then put it in. For me, it's that stuff that creates mood, tone and the feel of the story.

  • martinb

    Very brittle. Very New York. I liked the ending.

  • Carson Reeves

    I totally butcher names. It's these names with double letters in them that always get me. I always think, "Should I double check this?" Nahhhh. But you know what? As of this moment, I'm going to start double checking!

  • Anonymous

    I thought the dialogue was unintentionally funny for the most part.

    “Because pretty girls like to recruit their rejections and call them friends”

    A dude says that? Sounds like what a 15 year-old-girl would say in a huff as she plays with her hair.

    And there’s one spiel by Thomas near the end about how’ he’s not perfect and the world is ‘gray’, not of course, black and white!!!!!!! That only sounds plausible if it was uttered by someone who tried Lithium for the first time. And that Van Morrison and cheap cabernet line also near the end was a real howler.

    The only interesting person was the crazy mom. Everyone else was pretty dull; especially the protag.

    DON

  • Anonymous One

    It's not unintentionally funny. It's supposed to be funny and it's part of the sparkling writing that made Allan's career.

    It's a movie. Movie dialogue is supposed to shine. Bland, mundane everyday dialogue makes for a bland script.

    A reader, actor, producer, director wants to be entertained by the story as well as the dialogue.

    It comes under the category of powerful prose.

    That's my opinion from what I've seen, but you can toss it out because as you will rightly point out, there are plenty of scripts that sell with mundane dialogue!

    BTW, there are some writers who can take "normal" dialogue and by context make it great, but that's not the strength of this script. This dialogue is more in the vain of a writer who writes "clever" and that doesn't always work. I think the "clever" dialogue in Juno fails miserably and I have your take on that dialogue. But a hell of lot of people liked that movie.

  • Anonymous

    Brilliant. Really. Yes, it's a character study but that's what makes the audience fall in love with the story and care about what happens in the end. Similar in that way to "About a Boy" which was a fantastic movie. This would be great given the right cast and director. Angelina could be Johanna.

  • Anonymous

    Carson said – "the story itself is minimal to non-existent". I having trouble understanding this. To me, when I think of a coming of age script with "no story" – I imagine a lead character aimlessly wandering around, and the audience never knows what it is the protag really wants or why they're doing what they're doing. I feel like in "Living Boy" it's very clear what Thomas wants and what his motives are, and where he wants to end up… And he sets out trying to acheive these goals. Will he succeed or not? Isn't that a story? I didn't love this script, but I felt like it had a story. Am I wrong?

  • Anonymous

    Loved it, thought it was brilliantly written. Incredible characterization, yes, the taste and feel of New York, the sounds, the visuals, the descriptions were vivid.

    I think one of my sons was conceived during "Brown-eyed Girl" so don't knock the Van Morrison line. That song works. It will get a huge laugh from the boomers because it's so damn true.

    One of the best you've posted, Carson, and I've read them all. Well almost all. Completely addicted to this site. Thank you!

  • Anonymous

    Character descriptions in screenplays are to attract ACTORS. Character comes out of action.

  • Stephanie

    I loved it! I identify a lot with Mimi. Same personality. I'd love to play her! Can't wait to see who they cast. Rob Pattinson or Shia Labeouf would be good for Thomas. For some strange reason I see Robin Williams as Walter. I saw Robin in Good Will Hunting as I read it. I'm going to look into whose casting the film. Struggling actress trying to make it!

  • Anonymous

    you should another script of his, a rough draft, the floated around (no pun intended) about a boy being raised in space… it was really rough but I loved it was a real tear-jerker…

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