Scriptshadow 250 Contest Deadline – 82 days left!

Hey guys. No Amateur Offerings this weekend. However, use the comments to suggest/vote for a second chance review – a script from one of the previous Amateur Offerings that you felt deserved a shot at a review. You can nominate your own scripts, of course, but it will ultimately be up to the majority. In the meantime, I will give Scriptshadow brownie points to whoever comes up with the best logline that includes a kitten.

cute_kittens_pictures_15.

  • Poe_Serling

    My Second Chance Votes goes to the script LET US TOUCH THE SUN.

    Back then, Carson wrote:

    I really wanted to review “Let Us Touch The Sun” but the votes for that script seemed to be coming from a place of “Reward one of the best commenters” and not from a place of “I loved this screenplay.”

    But I think poster Randy Williams summed it up best for a lot of the SS voters that weekend:

    As for “Touch the Sun”, I never got a sympathy vote vibe for it at all that weekend. I thought
    everyone agreed it totally nailed the genre, for one.

    • Linkthis83

      LET US TOUCH THE SUN

      …for the win.

      • Levres de Sang

        Thanks Link! Even if nothing else comes of this script I’ll always have your amazing comment about being “adrift in realms…”

    • brenkilco

      The first one that occurred to me. Robbed in the first go round.

      • Levres de Sang

        Thanks brenkilco! (I know you liked the Tom Conway reference and I thought of you when I rewatched The Seventh Victim recently. His dialogue delivery was always so utterly compelling.)

    • ThomasBrownen

      My vote too: LET US TOUCH THE SUN

      • Levres de Sang

        Thanks Thomas!

    • Frankie Hollywood

      Wow, I was gonna put up my pilot, NIGHTMARE, but I think LET US TOUCH THE SUN is going to win by a landslide.

      Still, if anybody reads it and gives me their thoughts, that’ll be worth coming in a distant 2nd.

      TITLE: NIGHTMARE
      GENRE: (TV Pilot) Drama, Horror, Fantasy
      MASHUP: A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET meets THE MATRIX

      LOGLINE: You’ve heard of lucid dreaming, now there’s lucid nightmares. Dr. Brett Langton and his team have developed a procedure that lets you overcome your reoccurring nightmare by consciously putting you inside of it and having you battle your “monster.” You win, your nightmare ends. You lose…

      https://drive.google.com/file/d/0BxnBntA2zgPlUE04UVVRXzNYX2s/view?usp=sharing

      If you’d like to read other pilots NIGHTMARE would compare to: https://drive.google.com/folderview?id=0BxnBntA2zgPlflM3cVo5b3B5MmRWMjY5WXJTcWpWazdxWTMzMWU1WllFWHlieDI0ZUlObTQ&usp=sharing

      • Magga

        I’ll vote for Nightmare. Still didn’t get around to reading it, and I apologize for that since I asked to have it sent, but the premise is brilliant. This is how one votes, right,just mentioning it in the comments section?

      • tyrabanksy

        I’ll VOTE: NIGHTMARE.
        Just quickly skimmed over first page — right up my alley. I’d love to read it.

      • AstralAmerican

        Your synopsis reminds me of DREAMSCAPE:

        http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0087175/?ref_=nv_sr_1

      • carsonreeves1

        Good idea for a TV show.

      • hickeyyy

        Frankie, I’m excited to check this out. I had a nearly identical idea for a feature called Sleep Walkers. it was about a group of scientists that used a future technology of their own invention to enter the minds of people having recurring nightmares to kill them off. I got about 12 pages in and wasn’t happy with how I started it out, so I backed off and wrote a different screenplay (Oakwood/Hearse) instead.

        • Frankie Hollywood

          Thanks. Right now the series goal is just the patient entering their own nightmare to defeat their “monster” (and whoever they may bring into it — as in the pilot’s 2nd big nightmare, Aiden’s wife is part of his nightmare).

          If everything works out, I’ve been thinking of ways to keep things creative (besides a different patient/monster every week). People entering the nightmare INCEPTION style is an idea that’s definitely in the mix.

      • tyrabanksy

        Hey Frankie, just finished reading Nightmare. I really enjoyed it. You’ve done a great job of building the world, and I want to find out what happens next. You’ve set up a lot of really cool stuff.
        I have a couple of notes, just let me know if you want ‘em. :)

        • Frankie Hollywood

          Thanks for taking the time to give it a read, I’m glad you liked it.

          I’d love to hear your thoughts: lanzoweyn@live.com

    • Levres de Sang

      Thank you, Poe! You’ve been a great supporter of my script and once again it’s an honour to have your vote.

      • tyrabanksy

        I’d like to read this too. Do you have the original link? (Sorry if someone posted it, I can’t find it scrolling).

        • Levres de Sang

          Funnily enough I was making a few cosmetic amends only yesterday in readiness to send in for SS 250. Anyway, I’ll post my updated draft shortly…

          • Poe_Serling

            If your project is fortunate enough to get the nod for the Second Chance Amateur Review, I’d make sure to send Carson the updated* draft of your script.

            *On a few occasions I’ve seen him accidentally review older versions of the AF scripts due to some sort of mix up, miscommunication with the writers, etc.

            Hey, you might even want to throw in a ’70s Euro Horror film suggestion or two to get CR in the right frame of mind. ;-)

          • Levres de Sang

            Thanks Poe. This had crossed my mind so I did email Carson yesterday asking him not to review any older drafts that may be lurking around. (Of course, I’m not taking anything for granted.)

            ** I may well take up on your idea and suggest some 70s Euro Horror to CR! :)

    • http://www.imdb.com/name/nm1888937/ Rick McGovern

      I would like to see Let Us Touch The Sun as well.

      • Levres de Sang

        Thanks Rick!

  • jonsanhueza

    The first kitten born with the powers of speech decides to run for president, but comes under fire when he can’t decide in what political party he belongs. – daniel day lewis as the kitten.

    • carsonreeves1

      You mean when he can’t decide what purrlitical party he belongs.

      • jonsanhueza

        Ha! :)

  • brenkilco

    How about a tagline?

    THE KITTEN

    GENRE: HORROR

    “It’ll suck your breath away.”

  • Randy Williams

    Title: Kittens On A Plane
    Logline: A cat gives birth to a rambunctious litter of kittens on a transpacific flight.

    Tagline: The mile high club never had so much pussy.

    Sorry…:)

    Vote goes to “LET US TOUCH THE SUN”

    Second place, April 24th’s AOW’s, “TAMMY”

    • Felip Serra

      That tagline is like a hot 22 year old woman wearing Mom-jeans; it’s so wrong it feels right!

    • Levres de Sang

      Thanks Randy! It’s an honour to get the vote of a regular script reader such as yourself.

    • Cjv95

      And the Academy Award goes to…

  • carsonreeves1

    Wait, the kitten was the killer? Spoiler alert!

    • Randy Williams

      They switched from Fancy Feast to Purina.

  • carsonreeves1

    For the record, Kevin Spacey is starring in a film called “9 Lives” where he gets trapped inside the body of a cat. So cat movies are big right now.

    • klmn

      I heard the litter box scene is a showstopper.

  • lonestarr357

    Title: Catastrophe
    Genre: Family
    Logline: A pampered kitten who’s never been further than the front gate on his own must make a harrowing journey to rejoin the family that moved away while he slept.
    WYSR: Because you loved Milo and Otis and Homeward Bound as a kid (don’t deny it!), here’s another story that will excite you and tug at your heart. Did I mention that the kitten doesn’t talk?

    • Randy Williams

      I’m crying already. Good job!

  • Citizen M

    ENTANGLED
    Pandemonium ensues when a kitten gains super-powers and goes berserk in a yarn factory.

    Second chance: THE BATTLE OF MIRBAT

    • scriptfeels

      Carson already reviewed The Battle of Mirbat, I think it was reviewed on Friday, Jan 16th, but the page is coming up as unavailable for some reason…

      http://scriptshadow.net/amateur-friday-the-battle-of-mirbat/

      • Citizen M

        Thanks. I wasn’t sure if he’d done so, but i couldn’t find the AF article.

        Carson used to have an Archive column with all the posts, but it seems to have disappeared.

        • Linkthis83

          I miss the archive column.

  • Felip Serra

    “LET US TOUCH THE SUN”. Just do it…

    Logline for “OPERATION CUTE”:
    “Scientifically-enhanced yarn balls have escaped a secret government facility and descend upon a small town. Now a young Army lieutenant must train a group of kittens to deal with the impending threat.”

    • cjob3

      TAMMY. Good call.

    • Levres de Sang

      Thanks Felip! LET US TOUCH THE SUN has been through more than 100 iterations so it’s nice to know there’s still some “passion” left over.

  • klmn

    I nominate my script, CORRIDOR OF FREAKS.

    LOGLINE: Animal-rights activists break into a research lab where they encounter live, semi-human examples of genetic engineering gone wrong and have to escape becoming the next “lab rats.”

    This was one of the offerings the week before Carson started online voting. EMMA was the script selected that week. (Feb. 22, 2013) The script has been rewritten since then.

    Download here.

    http://www.mediafire.com/view/hq49y2y19e1doao/CORRIDOR_OF_FREAKS_BY_KENNETH_KLEEMANN.pdf

    Why you should read: You might enjoy it. You’ll never know unless you open it.

    • Poe_Serling

      Add another +1 vote from me if the animal-rights activists in your script rescue a cute kitten during their harrowing escape from the ‘lab.’

      • klmn

        They go into the lab after they hear that Dr. Michaels – aka Dr. Microbe – is using puppies in his experiments. In my book, puppies > kittens.

      • klmn

        And who says they escape?

        • Poe_Serling

          … during their harrowing escape attempt from the ‘lab.’ ;-)

    • Frankie Hollywood

      This is definitely up my alley, I’ll be checking it out.

      “to escape before becoming” Yeah?

      and maybe use “experiments” instead of “examples.” Sounds more sinister, no?

      • klmn

        I like the idea of using experiments, but it doesn’t work as a direct substitution. Thanks for the suggestion. I’ll have to play around with it.

        Maybe Animal-rights activists break into a research lab, encounter
        live, semi-human examples of genetic engineering gone wrong, and have to escape being used in the next experiments.

        There I end on the more sinister word. What do you think?

        • Frankie Hollywood

          Yep. I like using “experiments” when you’re dealing with doctors/medicine. Throw humans in the mix = bad news. Who the hell wants to be experimented on? Besides Steve Rogers.

          • klmn

            I think that’s better, but I don’t think I’ve got it yet.

            Maybe, Animal-rights activists break into a research lab. They enter the nightmare world of the corridors, where they encounter semi-human examples of genetic engineering gone wrong and have to escape being used in the next experiments.

          • Frankie Hollywood

            I think the first sentence is a bit abrupt/too short. Maybe:

            Animal-rights activists break into a research lab and encounter the nightmare world of semi-human examples of genetic engineering gone wrong, and must now escape being used in the next round of experiments. No use of “corridor” but…

            This is the first time I read it without wanting to put “before” in there. It still made me hesitate for millisecond, but now I see how it reads.

          • klmn

            Thanks. I think that’s the best so far.

            I’ll go with that from now on.

    • Meta5

      I’d like to see this one reviewed.

      • klmn

        Thanks.

  • S.C.

    I don’t believe that popular commentators should be given a free pass.

    However, for the effort he put into it, Gregory Mandarano’s I SHALL BE RELEASED deserves a look. It was probably the closest tie with the winning script on any AOW I’ve seen.

    Plus he’s a really great guy.

    P.S. Whatever wins, this weekend was a really great idea, Carson!

    • Randy Williams

      Is there anything of yours we can nominate? You’re such a prolific contributor. I really enjoy your posts and the videos you share. (especially the free movies on Youtube!)

      • S.C.

        Nothing yet, in the middle of writing a high-concept action comedy. Anyway, this is for scripts that were already on AOW but just missed out on being picked for Amateur Friday.

        In the meantime, here’s 1973’s THEATRE OF BLOOD.

    • Gregory Mandarano

      Aww shucks S.C.

  • Matthew Garry

    Any of:
    “New Coke”
    “Goodnight Nobody”
    “The Multiverse”

    Chad’s a prolific writer of high-quality scripts who somehow always manages to get featured on the wrong weekends. Any one of his scripts would be my candidate for a second chance.

    I liked “The Multiverse” least of these story wise, but that robot would look so great on the screen. I recently, by accident, stumbled upon a sci-fi short in which the robot immediately reminded me of this script. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5eIMafROjyo

    • Dan B

      Still need to read Multiverse… though I was going to recommend Tampa Bay from a few weeks ago. Chad’s had quite a few good ones on here.

    • hickeyyy

      I also want to put my vote towards the Multiverse.

    • Ben James

      The New Coke sounded interesting when I read the logline, but I don’t think I read the script. Now I’m wondering if it’s the same as “Untitled Coca-Cola Project” that’s listed as a sale on The Tracking Board a few weeks ago…

      Either a coincidence or…

      http://www.tracking-board.com/?s=coke

      • ChadStuart

        Coincidence. That’s from the guys who wrote “Zombieland”, I believe. Aaaaaand, it totally killed my chances.

        • cjob3

          Sorry, bro. I hate when that happens.

          • ChadStuart

            But, you know what? It proves that I’m on the right track concept-wise. It actually empowers me a bit (after a day of kicking, screaming and crying). So, maybe the next one will be the one that pops. All I can do is keep writing (working on one now and sketching out notes for one after that).

    • ChadStuart

      Thanks for the vote of confidence! However, it would appear I’m gonna miss out to “Let Us Touch the Sun”, which is my luck here on this site. But, really, I’m glad you remember my writing enough to think of me.

      • Kirk Diggler

        I liked Multiverse. Thought it was fun.

        • ChadStuart

          Thank you so much!

    • pmlove

      I can’t upvote but consider this a +1.

      Perhaps a COW Chad-only weekend is in order?

  • S.C.

    OT: This weekend’s box office results.
    http://deadline.com/2015/05/hot-pursuit-box-office-reese-witherspoon-sofia-vergara-1201422937/

    AVENGERS 2 down 60% on last weekend; not disastrous, but 7% worse than the first film.

    Hot Pursuit: Just listened to an interview with the co-writer of HOT PURSUIT:
    http://onthepage.libsyn.com/400-hot-pursuit

    Seems like a nice guy, but everything with that script seemed to go to easy. Maybe someone who wasn’t the star of the film needed to review that script.

    MAGGIE disappointing. Were people confused by the casting of Arnold Schwarzenegger?

    • cjob3

      Or burned out on zombies? I know I am.

  • rodneybr23

    My Vote goes to my own script, an action-comedy called “Partners In Crime” that was included in the amateur offerings late last year. Here’s the logline:

    Busted for smuggling drugs to bankroll their flight home, two spring breakers escape jail time by becoming snitches for a DEA Agent, in order to take down a Mexican drug lord.

    I also have a new script, a comedy called “Sarah’s Getting Married”. Here’s that logline:

    Harry Foster is running late for his daughter’s wedding, but he has a pretty good excuse – the entire state of Arizona is chasing him across the desert to put him back behind bars.

    Both scripts are available for download on my website: http://www.rodneybradley.weebly.com

    • scriptfeels

      Have you worked on Partners in Crime since or are you offering the same draft? I recall giving some notes on that one.

  • Fomocoin

    “PUSSYFOOTER” : A lonely scientist gets his claws into something he can’t get them out of when he steals a kitten from the lab.

  • Laura D.

    Agreed: Let Us Touch The Sun.

    Title: Gone Kitty Gone
    Logline: An animal loving mega-millionaire, disgusted with the antics
    of his wanton relatives, sets up a game of cat and mouse. He has deposited his
    favorite kitty somewhere in the Big Apple, and they have 24 hours to find twittlebits,
    or lose their inheritance.

    • Levres de Sang

      Thank you, Laura!

  • andyjaxfl

    OT: Finally saw Avengers: Age of Ultron. There’s some pretty good stuff in there, but as Carson mentioned in his review, the nonstop quips really pulled me out of the story and killed some dramatic moments (like Thor cracking jokes about the people Banner killed during the HYDRA raid when Banner is obviously disturbed by it).

    I loved the Natasha and Banner romance and the farm scenes. I thought the Stark/Ultron relationship paralleled with Gepetto/Pinocchio fell a little flat. I think they did a great job of Ultron or others telling us how much Ultron hated Tony, but they didn’t show me the hatred (at least not that I remember). And Ultron’s quips made him a less menacing villain.

    Overall, thought the movie was okay but feels like quite a bit of story and character were left on the cutting room floor. Marvel doesn’t do Director’s Cuts, but I’d love to see one of this film. Even in the movie were 3 hours long, audiences have flocked to these long epic movies (Titanic, Avatar, Dark Knight Rises) time and time again with enormous financial success, so I’m not sure why Disney/Marvel felt the need to trim this movie’s runtime down.

    • Poe_Serling
      • andyjaxfl

        Very cool poster. Still no release date though. I searched Google and came up with this interesting article about the movie by Zahler’s manager. Zahler has sold almost 25 spec scripts!!

        The article is touching and sad, particularly around the separate murders of his mother and father.

        http://hollywoodjournal.com/personal-journeys/the-making-of-bone-tomahawk-at-all-costs/20141027/

        • Citizen M

          That’s 25 unproduced spec scripts.

          I wouldn’t know whether to laugh or cry with a record like that.

          • Frankie Hollywood

            “I wouldn’t know whether to laugh or cry”

            I’d say it all depends on the size of his bank account.

          • Citizen M

            “I cried all the way to the bank.”

          • klmn

            Regardless of whether he gets paid, I think he’d still want to see his projects filmed and released.

          • klmn

            The article says they were sold but unproduced. I wonder what the situation is? – whether it was an option, whether it was sold (optioned) to a real prodco or studio, or to some wannabe without credits, connections and cash.

            If a script sells – or more likely is optioned – to the wrong buyer, that could be worse than not selling.

            Let’s hope that Bone Tomahawk will break things loose for Zahler and that more of his scripts will go into production.

          • andyjaxfl

            I’ve read interviews with screenwriters in which they show indifference to not having a script made. I can’t imagine being so blasé about it, though I’m indifferent when I put 200 hours of analysis into a review at work that leads nowhere.

        • Craig Mack

          Dallas is a good guy. Responded to a blind query for TDH right before Bone Tomahawk got greenlit. We did the dance a little bit. Down to earth. I’m excited for the film.

    • HRV

      I’m heading out to see it right now.

    • cjob3

      I actually was more annoyed by the quipping in the first. It bothers me that Tony Stark is funnier than Spider-Man now. I didn’t mind the banter as much this time because I expected it. But yeah, Ultron shouldn’t have been making jokes. The one were he blanked on the word “Children” bothered me. How can you ‘blank?’ You’re a computer.

  • tyrabanksy

    !!!***KITTENS***!!!

    SKINNED (horror/thriller): A maniac with cats grafted to his skin terrorizes a feuding royal family on vacation in the hopes of adding their famous Himalayan kitten to his collection.
    (ΦωΦ)
    PURR (supernatural thriller): After a forty eight hour stretch on the road, a lonely trucker picks up an abandoned kitten on the highway, but his new companion isn’t exactly what it seems and it won’t be left out in the cold again.

    • tyrabanksy

      CAT SCAN (horror/thriller): A young stewardess takes home a kitten left behind at the airport not realizing it’s a mule for a deadly new strain of Toxo.

    • tyrabanksy

      CAT EYE (horror): When a new building superintendent’s first task is to get rid of a nursing cat and its kittens living in the apartment of a recently deceased tenant, she is pitted against a much larger supernatural force that sends her into a paranoid downward spiral.

  • andyjaxfl

    My vote goes to LET US TOUCH THE SUN.

    • Levres de Sang

      Thanks Andy!

  • Kirk Diggler

    I’ll vote for ‘Guilt’ from just a few weeks ago.

  • Linkthis83

    KITTEN CABOODLE

    Genre: family/animation

    While living in a Children’s Home, a confident, wise-cracking therapy kitten loses his mother and his spirit, and one little girl decides she must help him before she leaves to live with her foster family.

  • Citizen M

    TOP DOG CAT

    Fur flies when Grumpy Cat realizes his biggest rival, Kute Kitten, is getting more YouTube hits than him, and organizes a flash mob to take him down.

    ATOMIC KITTEN

    A scientist must rescue his family’s pet kitten lost in a reactor going critical using an experimental radiation-hardened exoskeleton and a piece of paper on a string.

  • klmn

    And now a kitten logline:

    A well-known blogger performs a Gangnam Style dance while wearing pants stuffed with kittens. If this logline wins, Carson will perform this for YouTube.

    • carsonreeves1

      I stopped stuffing my pants with kittens in 2004.

  • tyrabanksy

    O.T. – Anyone have the script for 47 Meters Down?

    • S.C.

      Sorry, no. Anyone else?

      • tyrabanksy

        Probably no one else, if you don’t have it. You’re the script-master. Appreciate you asking though :)

        • S.C.

          The script isn’t on Tracking Board but it might be on Write-to-Reel or Done Deal or some other site where some people get their scripts; that’s why I ask.

          Trouble is, some scripts are out there and some aren’t. For some reason this one isn’t… yet. Seems odd – you’d think they’d want to drum up some support for the film.

          • tyrabanksy

            All they need is Mandy Moore in a bikini, I guess. I don’t even think it’ll be that great, I’ve just been trying to read more contained/small cast thrillers. And I love shark movies… or at least I did before 2012.
            Thanks for checking, eh. I had a brief bout on W2R before it started charging (do people still use it?), and someone posted this fucking omnibus of Buffy scripts and that was amazing… Now I’m going OT on my OT…

          • S.C.

            I’ve sent you some scripts, including BAIT by Bret Easton Ellis that sounds very similar to 47 Meters Down.

          • tyrabanksy

            AHHH!!! Thank you so much!!! I was looking for BAIT a while ago and was super disappointed that I couldn’t find it. Same goes for the pilot. You just made my morning!

          • pmlove

            Hey Scott – would you mind forwarding any Bret Easton Ellis scripts you have? Much appreciated.

            lovepeterm gmail

          • tyrabanksy

            Man, I was super into BAIT right up until the last 2 pages. WTF kind of tag was that? It suddenly switched gears to 70s horror film? Everything before it was golden. Love teenagers in peril…

            I hate myself for how much I loved that Scream pilot. The only thing that seemed similar to Scream was the Noah (Randy) character and the basic premise of teens being sliced and diced… but that whole Brandon thing… Felt more like Friday the 13th/Hatchet/etc. Makes me wonder why they even bothered calling it Scream – unless it’s a total red herring. At any rate, I’m stoked as fuck for the show now. I was practically pulling my hair out on the subway reading the last few pages.
            What’d you think?

  • Guy Somebody

    HERE I COME MR. JENKINS

    A country kitten after witnessing his mother’s euthanization and then escaping a drowning sack filled with his siblings tossed into the river, finds he is now all alone and afraid so he heads to the big city to find his estranged father, the only family he has left, an alley cat named Mr. Jenkins.

  • Citizen M

    WE LOVE YOU, KITTY

    When a billionaire dies leaving all his money to a kitten, his dysfunctional family must compete with each other for custody of his pet by proving to the old-school lawyers which one the kitten loves the most.

    FASTEST PAWS IN THE WEST

    Sheriff ‘Dozy Doc’ Mulligan’s pet kitten has his work cut out keeping the peace when notorious gunslinger ‘Raw Meat’ Pete and his wolf ride into town.

  • Ollie23

    A weed smoking kitten befriends Seth Rogen.

  • Eddie Panta

    VOTE: Let Us Touch the Sun

    • Levres de Sang

      Thanks Eddie! I know you like 70s giallos and Euro Horror so I really appreciate your vote.

  • S.C.

    KITTEN KONG

    • Felip Serra

      Finally! A catastrophe I can look forward to!

  • walker

    Worth a second look:

    Surviving Life by Stephanie Jones

    Lost in the Supermarket by Rich Figel

    Broken Vessel by Trevor McCall

    • Joel

      walker,

      Thanks for suggesting Broken Vessel as a second look possibility!

    • Stephjones

      Thanks Walker! You’re the best!

  • cjob3

    PERFECT! This is so odd, I was just going to write Carson about getting an Amateur script a second chance!

    ‘Bout 2 years ago I found an amateur script on Talentville that I was REALLY impressed with. Turns out- the writer is a former writing partner of Steven Coogan! (THEE Steve Coogan!) The subject matter was something I’ve never seen before. It follows an aspiring court jester on his quest to perform before the king. It got put up for AM FRI consideration, but IMO, it really didn’t get a fair shake. The SS army was uncharacteristically hostile that week for some reason. If you liked “Not Safe For Work” or “Miss Universe,” check out “FOOL.” It’s one of better scripts I’ve read. I’ll try to get a script link for you.

    TITLE: Fool
    GENRE: Comedy
    LOGLINE: Showbusiness today might be a snake-pit of jealousy and backstabbing, but once upon a time, it wasn’t even that nice.

    • hickeyyy

      That’s a seriously awesome premise. Nice find.

      • cjob3

        Right?! Glad I’m not the only one.

    • Citizen M

      It wasn’t bad. Here’s the AOW link:

      http://scriptshadow.net/amateur-offerings-weekend-is-here/

      • cjob3

        Eh, you’re right. I withdraw my statement.

        • walker

          Well Citizen M has been a tough crowd since the Middle Ages.

  • klmn

    And now a little kitten music…

  • Meta5

    OT: Has anyone seen The Voices yet? What did you think? I liked it quite a bit. I never read the script, I’m curious to know how close it was to the film.

    • carsonreeves1

      It was close. It was a little zanier than the script (which was darker). But for the most part, pretty close.

      • scriptfeels

        One of my favorite scripts, still haven’t watched it yet, will probably wait for it to get on netflix though. Was the ending as ridiculous as it was in the script haha

    • Javier Eliezer Otero

      I saw it and I realy liked it. Never read the script, though.

  • Gregory Mandarano

    Hahahaha

  • Gregory Mandarano

    I nominate my Levon Helm biopic ‘I Shall Be Released’ and I’m not kitten. But LUTTS will probably win. Requests for that review have been floating for a long time.

  • Garrett

    Kitten logline: “When an abused kitten escapes her tormentor, she must learn to survive in the arctic Alaskan frontier with a lost and disoriented polar bear cub.”

  • walker

    In a dystopian future, an evil tyrant pits his desperate subjects against each other in a cruel game that offers magical “brownie points” to whoever comes up with the best logline that includes a kitten.

  • carsonreeves1

    Wait. Whaa?…. how…. but….. it can’t….. is something…. Is this a ghost????????

    • HRV

      He just got out of rehab.

      • walker

        Oh man I hope not.

        • Poe_Serling

          …gentle as a puppy dog.

  • Gregory Mandarano

    Curiosity

    When the purrpetrator of vicious murder escapes custody, a purrrsuasive reporter from the evening mews must use the suspects kitten to track him down before he kills again.

  • HRV

    “New Coke” comes to mind.

  • scriptfeels

    I’ll vote for ‘They Ate The Horses’, as a comeback script. It’s a post-apocalyptic Monster Film that revolves around a group of teenagers attempting to survive when they get separated from their families.

    The benefactor was reviewed from that week. I voted for it because I thought it was established from a book, and the writing read more ‘literate’ to me, but I really enjoyed They Ate The Horses and would love to see Carson’s thoughts on it.

    http://scriptshadow.net/amateur-offerings-2/

    mediafire link to ‘They ate the Horses’, from the AO:
    http://www.mediafire.com/view/d7wfqzq4b1vfo37/They_Ate_the_Horses_10-24.pdf

    I’ve actually been mulling over a movie idea about a boy and a cat, let me see what I can do for a logline….

    On a journey to find his lost kitten, a sullen 10-year-old boy wanders into a world ruled by forest gods, demons, and monsters, and where humans are changed into beasts.

  • http://joelthomaswrites.com writerjoel

    Gee, how about CONDEMNED?

    http://scriptshadow.net/amateur-offerings-11/

    LOGLINE FOR “K-K-K-K-K-K KAT-CAN-DO”: After mice develop invisibility to starve cats to death by stealing the kibble from their food bowls, a lone kitten with “special sight”–the ability to see a glowing red dot where the the mice are cloaked–must destroy the mouse horde before her human shouts, “Tempurra! Din-din!”

  • Levres de Sang

    Very difficult to choose just one AOW near-miss, but all things considered…

    My Vote: THE STAG

    From the same week as my own script! Mysterious mountain man seeks revenge on a group of weekend adventurers in the wilds of Tasmania. Echoes of both Deliverance and Walkabout. Stayed up late to finish this one!

    RUNNER-UP: EVE (by A.R. Guess)

    From around a year ago, but a brilliantly written and conceived utopian drama. Dialogue superbly atmospheric, too. This one really missed out, I feel.

    • Linkthis83

      I enjoyed THE STAG as well and it certainly would’ve received my vote had your script not been in that particular weekend.

    • Shawn Davis

      I’m in for The Stag.

    • DavydSC

      I’m glad you posted this, Levres. I was just about to post a vote for The Stag (along with my kitty logline). Glad I’m not alone. But you’re crushing here so look forward to your long-awaited review.

      • Levres de Sang

        Thank you, Davyd. Although I still think it’s worth registering your vote for The Stag as I suspect Carson may well repeat this “Second Chance” opportunity at some point.

        ** The Stag also reminds me of 1932 classic The Most Dangerous Game.

  • sad jane

    2nd Chance: Let us touch the sun.
    Kitty Kat vs. Kim K.
    LL: Kitty Kat grows a bigger butt then Kim kardasian and is an overnight youtube sensation. She takes over the spotlight and gets lip fillers. Everyone in the world is obsessed and noone watches the kardasian show anymore. Kim and her family hunt Kitty Kat to the ends of the earth to kill her.

    • Levres de Sang

      Thank you, Sad Jane! And welcome to SS comments!

      ** Someone said my script title sounded like a long lost Doors song… I think your name sounds like a long lost Velvet Underground number! :)

      • sad jane

        thanks for the welcome mat. i’ve been lurking about for quite some time with a user name that just didn’t fit. your name is very smoke jackety, New Orleans, circa Vampire Lestat. hope your script gets the 2nd chance AOR. :)

        • Levres de Sang

          Ooh, I like that description… :) It’s also the original French title of a 1975 Jean Rollin flick, Lips of Blood. A wonderful film, by the way.

  • Evangelos

    TITLE: Kill The Pussy: Vol. 1
    The real Charlie Schmidt piano Tabby cat awakens from a seven year coma and must exact revenge on the Tabby cat that stole his idea.
    TAGLINE: (wakes up from coma, sees youtube video) You gotta be kitten me, man!

    My vote goes for: Let us touch the sun.

    • Levres de Sang

      Thanks Evangelos!

  • Javier Eliezer Otero

    My vote goes to Rose

  • Evangelos

    The Death of Kitty galore

    When Carson’s beloved kitten, Kitty Galore, pees on his hard drive, deleting all his files. Carson kills it and eats its brains in front of Kathleen Kennedy and gets offered a shot to direct a Star Wars Anthology film and casts Michael j Fox as his lead Boba Fett.

  • Howie428

    I scanned back across my notes from the various weeks and I’m having all sorts of trouble remembering which ones I liked got a Friday and which ones didn’t! The Saturdays and Fridays sort of merge together in my mind.

    “New Coke” would be a fun discussion given that the strength of the concept has been proven by producers developing a version of it.

    “I Shall Be Released” is one I’m waiting to see at some point in the future, even though I’m hoping for a re-written version of it.

    I missed reading “Let Us Touch the Sun,” but the concept seemed solid and it was a surprise to see it not selected that week.

    I should probably blow my own trumpet, since my “Midas” entry was one where Carson commented on the selection for that week being really close. PAH-PA-RAH! That’s the sound of my trumpet!

    • Levres de Sang

      I seem to recall Midas catching a fair few votes!

    • Gregory Mandarano

      I already rewrote it that first week after the notes.

  • Eric

    Is it weird that I actually have a cat related idea banging around in my head? Underdeveloped, but here goes…

    TITLE: I Heart Pussy

    GENRE: Comedy

    LOGLINE: A timid 30-year-old shut-in must infiltrate the underground world of international catfighting when his only friend, a tabby cat named Fluffles, is abducted and sold into kitty servitude.

    WYSR: Cause it’s just a logline. How lazy are you?

    Here’s some of the high-octane action…

    • IgorWasTaken

      Love it. And as much as I like your title, too, I think the script (if/when writtem) would be even better if you could convince Grendl to give up his title –

      TAKEN 4 – This time it’s purrsonal.

    • lonestarr357

      ‘WYSR: Cause it’s just a logline. How lazy are you?’

      Why didn’t I think of this?

  • GoIrish

    Fast and Purrious: Tokyo Dander
    “I don’t have friends. I got a litter.”

  • ddw1978

    Second chance review: My script for Indy 5, Indiana Jones and the Stone of Destiny, was runner-up to the western Oakwood a couple of months ago. I think the screenplay would make a great discussion, exploring the idea of fan-fiction and ways to reboot a beloved franchise. And of course I would like the script critiqued on artistic and technical merit.

    • ddw1978

      Title: Indiana Jones and the Stone of Destiny
      Logline: Do to the effects of nuclear radiation, Indiana Jones snaps. Out of nowhere he kills his son with a rock and names his kitten Mutt.

      • IgorWasTaken

        Title: Indiana Jones and the Stones of Destiny

        Logline:After a global thermo-nuclear war, Indy goes on a hunt for Al Gore’s impenetrable Social Security lockbox on which the future of the humanity now depends – because it holds the only set of cryo-frozen human gonads not rendered sterile by the fallout.

    • Poe_Serling

      And they just happen to be looking for a story/script for Indy 5…

      http://www.vanityfair.com/hollywood/2015/05/indiana-jones-sequel-confirmed?

  • klmn

    Carson, there’s a movie you should see. Of course I’m talking about the classic: THE CORPSE GRINDERS, directed by Ted V. Mikels.

    Logline (from IMDB): When the Lotus Cat Food Company finds itself in financial trouble, the
    owners decide to find a new, cheap source of meat — the local
    graveyard. Only one problem — soon cats develop a taste for human
    flesh, and tabbies are tearing out throats all over town.

    http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0068414/combined

    The trailer:

    • Poe_Serling

      My suggestion for Carson: The Uncanny.

      It’s a horror anthology featuring the always watchable Peter Cushing. Here he plays a writer with evidence for his publisher that our feline friends are all evil and planning to take over the world.

      • klmn

        Cats are so sneaky, I wouldn’t put it past ‘em.

      • Levres de Sang

        How about an atmospheric Val Lewton double bill: Cat People (1942) and Curse of the Cat People (1944).

        • Poe_Serling

          A great double feature and a double dose of producer Val Lewton – one of the true pioneers of the B-movie horror genre.

          Simone Simon at her best. Added bonus: Cat People also co-starred Tom Conway, which Lewton supposedly called ‘the nice George Sanders.’

          • Levres de Sang

            For me, Val Lewton was one of the medium’s geniuses — despite ‘only’ being a producer. His sequence over B-pictures have always been huge favourites of mine.

            And Tom Conway… One of my favourite 1940s character actors if only for the inflection of his voice.

          • Poe_Serling

            Most of Lewton’s creative ouput can be found in this DVD collection:

            http://www.oldies.com/product-view/0327GD.html

            A worthy addition to anyone’s film library.

          • Levres de Sang

            Yes, it looks essential (especially with those bonus documentaries) and a considerable upgrade from my VHS cassettes recorded directly from TV broadcasts!

      • davejc

        Poe, I just saw IT’S ALIVE. What a fun campy movie it was! Great concept! I’m surprised it doesn’t have more of a following.

        • Poe_Serling

          Director/writer Larry Cohen was throwing some crazy ass stuff up on the screen at that time in the ’70s/early ’80s.

          “I’m surprised it doesn’t have more of a following.”

          Count me in the non-following category. For whatever reason I just couldn’t get into the story groove of that particular film.

          The one Cohen film from that era that I thought was really trippy:

          God Told Me To.

          It’s just a wild and crazy ride of religion/alien abduction/NYC police business in a sci-fi/horror wrapper.

        • Poe_Serling

          Larry Cohen was throwing some crazy ass stuff up on the screen during that time in the ’70s/early ’80s.

          “I’m surprised it doesn’t have more of a following.”

          Count me in the non-following category. For whatever reason I could never get into the story groove of that particular film.

          The one Cohen film from that era I found really trippy to watch:

          God Told Me To.

          It’s a wild and crazy hodgepodge of religion/alien abduction/NYC police business in a sci-fi/horror wrapper.

    • S.C.

      The whole movie!

  • davejc

    My vote: LET US TOUCH THE SUN

    • Levres de Sang

      Thanks Dave!

      ** Would love to see Carson’s take on your 50 HIGH ST. A highly original and visceral script.

      • davejc

        I’m doing a rewrite as we speak(thank you, Paul!) and I’ll be entering it in Page this week.

  • Buddy

    Carson, if you really want to review a film about cat, you have to find this one :
    http://deadline.com/2015/01/barry-sonnenfeld-europacorp-nine-lives-1201348574/

  • S.C.
    • Buddy

      looks cheesy…nah ?

      • S.C.

        I think I’ll skip it. Looks like TANK GIRL!

  • andyjaxfl

    Title: PURRY MASON

    Logline: After a litter of kittens goes missing, a notorious dog-hating feline lawyer’s prejudices are put to the test when the court declares he must defend the gentle pit bull accused of the crime.

  • Jack F.

    My vote goes to “Let Us Touch The Sun”.

    • Levres de Sang

      Thanks Jack!

    • klmn

      That looks to be the winner. I’ll look forward to C’s review.

  • romer6

    Can´t … stop… laughing…. help.

  • HRV

    Awww, what a cute, little, um, Kitty. My wife has asked me where I come up with my sometimes crazy ideas. I told her that, as writers we have to be able to think up things that in real life we would otherwise never entertain the thought of doing. When I saw this post I thought: This has sexual innuendo written all over it — whether deliberate or not. Some ideas posted have touched that line. I came up with a grindhouse type title and logline that would cross the line in it’s coarser form, so I’ve edited it in an effort not to offend.
    Title: Kittywhipped
    Logline: A foolish rapist incurs a virgin’s wrath after he brutally violates her innocent kitty.

    • S.C.

      That’s a really important point, SRV. Writers have really far out ideas, some of which they might not want to share with other people! But if you don’t have these ideas, you’re not really brainstorming, you’re self-censoring.

      I’m not offended by your pitch – I think it’s bang-on that 70s exploitation style.

      However, I wouldn’t put it forward for Scriptshadow 250!!!

      Jonathan Demme directed this.

      http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/f/fd/Caged_Heat_film_poster.jpg

      Jonathan Demme did NOT direct this!

      http://critcononline.com/images/caged%20heat%203000%20vhs%20front.jpg

      That is my favorite tagline of all time!!!!

      • S.C.

        Sorry, I meant HRV! Doing that a lot lately…

        • HRV

          That’s cool. You’re definitely not the only one whose posts include typos. And, re: Scriptshadow 250, there will be no script written under that title.

    • klmn

      Of course, there’s that classic Ann Margaret movie, Kitten With A Whip.

      • S.C.

        Full movie, if anyone wants it.

  • http://www.linkedin.com/pub/brett-martin/52/702/72 ElectricDreamer

    My fistful of worthy candidates are:

    LET US TOUCH THE SUN.
    I SHALL BE RELEASED.
    TAMMY.
    ROSE.
    THE MULTIVERSE.

    Any of these can expect full notes from me if they land in the AF spotlight.

    • Levres de Sang

      Thanks Electric! Your notes are legendary around these parts! :)

    • cjob3

      I’m standing by FOOL for what it’s worth, but I’m glad to see TAMMY getting attention. I was really impressed by what I read of it.

  • Scott Reed

    Second Chance?: Tammy… Like, way for sure!

    I’d love to see Carson’s thoughts on how to focus this one.

    Cute, soft, cuddly kitty…

    Kitty-Title: Death Perception

    Kitty-Line: After a kitten is found by police lapping blood from a mangled corpse of a slaughtered family, the rescue family experiences a series of unnerving events, fearing the kitten is not so innocent.

  • NajlaAnn

    Cute kitty!

  • Pooh Bear

    My vote is NEW COKE.

  • Eddie Panta

    I’m going to show you something that only two people in the world know about…

    • S.C.

      I was looking for a kitten-based horror flick but came up with nothing. Good find!

    • Bluedust

      Caskets are optional on the West Coast, lmao.

  • IgorWasTaken

    If you’re willing to give up that title as a trade for a-title-to-be-named-later, please let Eric use it with his logline, posted here – http://scriptshadow.net/vote-for-a-second-chance-amateur-review/#comment-2016184460

    • Eric

      I’m offering a years supply Meox Mix. Six months if your cat eats organic. I’m not made of money over here ;)

  • IgorWasTaken

    Family Guy – Bach and Debussy

    • IgorWasTaken

      What cracks me up about that bit: The crowd. I just think the timing needed a half-second more pause.

  • Beautiful Derek

    Antibodyssey

    A streetwise Tabby and his month old kitten prance across New Jersey to visit his 19 year old alley cat father who is dying of feline AIDS.
    ———
    My 2nd chance vote is for my horror/comedy script Tuesday’s Gone!

    • pmlove

      Only just seen this, but also a plus one from me.

      When do we get something new from you? I’d love to give something a read – lovepeterm at gmail.

  • The IOS

    Let us touch the Sun is pretty good so I’ll have to go with that one.

    What do you guys think of this logline?

    TITLE: NOT Cat People
    GENRE: Comedy
    LOGLINE: A recently divorced couple gathers friends, family, and acquaintances to help each of them sweep NYC to find a their kitten that has swallowed the key to a vault that holds $1,000,000.

    • Citizen M

      I’d call it KITTY PLEASE DON’T POOP.

    • Levres de Sang

      Thanks IOS!

  • Midnight Luck

    I was always such a fan of Stephen King’s CATS EYE and PET SEMATARY.
    Both are about cats. In one the cat is always climbing onto the kids chest while he sleeps at night in order (spoiler!) To “Steal” his breath from him. In the other the main character is so distraught when their cat dies that he buries it in the Pet Sematary and it then (spoilers!) comes back over and over, stalking him and driving them insane. then things get REALLY weird.
    Great cat stories.