It should be an incredible weekend. Or should I say, incredibles weekend? Heh heh. Get it? Cause of the Incredibles 2 movie with the baby. Why I haven’t segued into stand up comedy at this point is beyond a mystery.
But seriously, I have a question for you guys. I’ve read numerous stories over the years of famous writers going to a specific motel in the desert and not leaving until they finished their book/script. Does anybody know what motel that is? I want to say it’s near Joshua Tree but I’m not positive. I feel like some of our esteemed historians can help me find the answer. Oh, and while you’re working through that, check out some new scripts!
The rules to Amateur Offerings are simple. Read as much as you can from each script and vote for your favorite in the comments. The script with the most votes gets a review next week!
And if you believe you have a screenplay that’s better than anything Hollywood is making at the moment, submit it for a future Amateur Offerings! Send me a PDF of your script, along with the title, genre, logline, and why you think people should read it (your chance to pitch yourself or your story). All submissions should be sent to Carsonreeves3@gmail.com.
Title: Heroes of the Penitentiary
Genre: TV – One Hour Pilot
Logline: The pilot for this episodic anthology Mafia series tells the true story of Chris Rosenberg, a Jewish American who—en route to pursuing his futile lifelong dream of becoming the mob’s first non-Italian inductee—caught the lustful eye of sadistic Gambino capo Roy DeMeo and became a willing participant in one of the most notorious murder sprees in American history.
Why You Should Read: The pilot tells one of the more explosive, untold stories in American history in recounting the exploits of the DeMeo crew, who devised a systematic method of murder in a human slaughterhouse where 100s were killed. At its heart though, the pilot is the biography of Chris Rosenberg, a Jewish American who grew up in an all Italian neighborhood and gravitated towards the mob. He caught the eye of sadistic Gambino capo Roy DeMeo and joined his crew, eventually becoming a remorseless killer. It’s a fascinating character study because Chris came from a good family (his brother went on to be a doctor) so it begs the question: what drives someone to be this way? Is it genetics? Environment? Experience? We’ll never know, but my hope is if you enjoy dark human stories, especially ones told from the perspective of dark protagonists, you’ll like this one. You can think of it as Goodfellas on acid or Nightcrawler / Good Time meets the mob.
Title: Color of Fire
Genre: Crime Drama
Logline: While struggling to find his footing in society, a homeless ex-con is coerced by undercover cops into stealing from his former gang, jeopardizing the lives of his newfound friends.
Why You Should Read: I’m an avid reader of ScriptShadow that needs his daily fix in order to function normally at work. The characters hit me before the concept did; in a sense, this idea wouldn’t exist without them. I was also in a bad place last summer just after moving out here to Los Angeles: facing living on the streets, dealing with psychotic roommates, barely living off of spare change leftover from a writing assignment two months prior. I needed the protagonist to get out of his slump before I could get out of mine. This script isn’t structured in typical fashion, and it has nothing to do with trying to “break the rules.” I’ve followed the rules plenty and I’m a firm believer in them. I’m also a firm believer in doing something genuine, and allowing it to be different. Hopefully this comes through in the screenplay.
Title: Under the Vultures
Genre: Western
Logline: As a zombie plague spreads throughout the Old West, a reformed outlaw must escort a sick girl to sanctuary while being pursued by his old gang and the undead.
Why You Should Read: The first scene won the Opening Scene Contest right here on Scriptshadow. Thanks to some helpful feedback, both the scene and the script have come a long way since then. The concept is both simple and marketable: cowboys versus zombies. And Hollywood has yet to produce a feature film to mainstream audiences. With additional help from the Scriptshadow community, this could be that film. Thank you, and hope you enjoy.
Title: Witness
Medium: TV Pilot
Genre: Ensemble Thriller
Logline: A lawyer, a US Marshal’s Agent and a big pharma exec turned FBI informant will work to take down the billionaire CEO that has just released a controversial drug that may be damaging children’s brains.
Why You Should Read: This pilot is the highest rated pilot I’ve ever written, making it into the top 5 on the pilot section of the Blacklist website. I’d love to get feedback on how to take it to the next level though, so I’d love for your readers to take a look. It’s slightly non-linear in its approach and I know not everyone will love that, but it’s intentional.
Title: THE OFFERING
Genre: Horror
Logline: A troubled young woman who wakes up chained to a tree in the middle of the woods must solve the mystery of what is happening and who put her there, and find a way to escape before someone, or something, comes for her.
Why You Should Read: After recently completing a micro-budget debut feature “The Ferryman,” I decided there were too many characters and locations for my small film-making mind to deal with, so my next project is going to be this one character, one location script, or “contained horror”. Feedback so far has called it “The Wicker Man” meets “The Babadook” but I’m probably going to stick “High Noon meets “The Ritual” on the poster when it’s made. Give it a read and see what “Something meets Something” you think it is! But seriously I’d love to know what the Scriptshadow community thinks of it, any feedback at all on where I can improve this in further drafts would be hugely appreciated. Oh, this comes with concept art, too.
