This is your chance to discuss the week’s amateur scripts, offered originally in the Scriptshadow newsletter. The primary goal for this discussion is to find out which script(s) is the best candidate for a future Amateur Friday review. The secondary goal is to keep things positive in the comments with constructive criticism.
Below are the scripts up for review, along with the download links. Want to receive the scripts early? Head over to the Contact page, e-mail us, and “Opt In” to the newsletter.
Happy reading!
TITLE: Surviving Life
GENRE: Comedy
LOGLINE: An angsty older woman, with money woes, fakes being timid to attract a rich fiance who insists she toughen up by completing a survival cruise with his maladjusted sister.
WHY YOU SHOULD READ: Surviving Life is a lowbrow comedy, with heart. There’s no poop or fart jokes but crudeness and profanity abound. It’s a female buddy movie with older protagonists. Some might find my main character, Helen, to be unsympathetic, but I wanted her to be her own worse enemy because the story is about making bad choices. The characters are older because I tried to explore how fear can shrink our lives as we age. I’m submitting to AF in the hopes of finding out what works and what doesn’t. Thanks ahead of time for any feedback.
TITLE: Vegas Trio
GENRE: Dark Comedy
LOGLINE: Three master pick up artists find themselves in way over their heads after they become criminals in order to keep up with their drug and sex fueled Vegas lifestyle.
WHY YOU SHOULD READ: I won’t waste your time describing how good I THINK this script is. You’ll decide that for yourself. You should read this script because it will give me exposure. I can’t get anywhere as a screenwriter if I’m not exposed on sites like Scriptshadow. I mean, I’m in the middle of Arkansas with a wife and baby. I’m not going to sell a spec in this ultra competitive industry unless websites like yours know I exist. So I need your help. I’m out of money, out of patience, and out of options. If this screenwriting thing is EVER going to happen for me, it needs to happen within the next year. It would be an honor if Scriptshadow got the ball rolling on my career.
TITLE: The Fireseed
GENRE: True Crime Drama
LOGLINE: Based on real events, The Fireseed tells of a deeply closeted governor on the brink of re-election who must stop a network of twelve serial killers before they expose him and kill his nephew.
WHY YOU SHOULD READ: The events on which The Fireseed is based have never been brought to the screen. Between 1974 and 1983 a network of serial killers known as The Family were thought responsible for 300 abductions and five murders in my hometown of Adelaide, Australia.
TITLE: The Devil’s Teardrop
GENRE: Crime thriller
LOGLINE: A master thief must confront betrayal in his crew and overcome a brutal gangster as he steals four of the world’s most valuable diamonds in order to get his hands on his ultimate quarry: the 1,000-year old red diamond known as the Devil’s Teardrop.
WHY YOU SHOULD READ: I lived in Saudi Arabia for a year and Colombia for three. (More broadly, I’ve spent a lot of time overseas, and that matters for the script because it features a number of overseas locations.)
TITLE: Canary in a Coal Mine.pdf)
GENRE: Animated comedy with dark overtones
LOGLINE: When a young canary discovers the true purpose of canaries in a 1930s coal mine, he teams with a boy miner to improve working conditions for birds and boys alike.
WHY YOU SHOULD READ: Canary in a Coal Mine is a Nicholl Fellowship semi-finalist and Austin Film Fest Second Rounder. It was discussed on John August’s ScriptNotes podcast as part of their 3-Page Challenge, and it’s garnered attention from Disney and Sony Animation. So it’s got that going for it, which is nice.
As for me, I’m a persistent writer who has submitted to ScriptShadow 8 or 9 times, but this is the first in 2014. I love the website and the scripts. However, I’ve noticed one thing missing — CANARY MINERS. You need canary miners wearing tiny helmet lamps and speaking Scranton lingo to be complete. Trust me.
