I was thinking of all these movies that have been invading my streaming services as of late. As we get further and further away from top-level Hollywood films, I’ve gotten used to “average” being the new “good.”
A lot’s been made of Netflix’s new “Top 10” list, which I admit I like. It helps me spot movies every once in a while that I, otherwise, would’ve missed. Like The Platform. But mostly what it’s told me is that America’s bar is getting lower by the day. Big splashy headlines touted The Old Guard taking the number 1 slot on Netflix a couple of weeks ago. “A sequel is coming!” we’re told, emphatically. But should we really trust a system that has The Kissing Booth 2 as its current champion?
I’ve even seen articles trying to convince me that a Dave Franco directed movie about an AirBnB rental that stars his wife is worth checking out. I don’t wanna be mean here so I’m just going to say, I’m not checking out a bored married couple’s weekend filmmaking experiment.
All this got me thinking about what projects are floating in the Development Hell netherworld that would be SO MUCH BETTER than anything we’re getting at the moment. It might surprise you that I wouldn’t put many of my [NEWLY UPDATED!!] Top 25 scripts on that list. The reason a lot of those scripts remain unmade is because they have certain challenges that are hard to overcome.
Desperate Hours is stuck over at Johnny Depp’s production house and will only ever get made if he decides to make it. Executive Search is a thousand years old and people in Hollywood always assume old scripts that never made it through the system have something wrong with them. Origin of a Species is a really weird script that doesn’t fit into any marketable genre. The writer of Dogs of Babel told me himself that it’s such an oddball premise, everything has to line up perfectly if it’s ever going to get made.
Hollywood is such a weird place that you never know what’s going to get a project through the system. The only reason a movie about a kid who idolizes Hitler got made is because the writer became the hottest name in Hollywood. Would we have ever seen JoJo Rabbit had Waititi not directed Thor: Ragnarok? My guess is no.
This leads us to today’s question, which is, what script have I read in my ten years at Scriptshadow that I am still SHOCKED hasn’t been made into a movie yet? We’re talking a movie I’m POSITIVE would make at least 750 million worldwide. Does that help any of you? It’s likely only Scriptshadow OGs know the answer to this one.
This clue might help. There are three famous movies/franchises that EVER SINCE THEY CAME OUT, Hollywood readers have been desperately looking for the “next” version of. Those three franchises are Goonies, Raiders, and Ghostbusters.
I’m always on the lookout for the next version of those. But there’s a reason we haven’t gotten one. It’s because if you veer too close to the star that is Raiders/Goonies/Ghostbusters, you’re accused of copying. “This is exactly like Raiders,” the reader tells you. I cannot convey the sheer number of Goonies-wannabe scripts that have come across my desktop. And they’re all exactly the same – they’re “Goonies.”
On the flip side, if you write something *too* different, people don’t associate it with the original film, which is the whole point of writing something similar, so that people can say, “This is the next Raiders!”
Well, in all the years I’ve been reading, one spec script has managed to do it. And that script is… DRUM ROLL PLEASE… anybody know? Anyone? Anyone?
Roundtable by Brian K. Vaughn.
The logline is, “Merlin assembles a group of modern-day knights to battle a resurrected ancient evil, but all that’s available are an alcoholic ex-Olympian, a geriatric actor, a grumpy billionaire, and a nerdy scientist.”
This supernatural comedy has the goofy sensibility of a team of inexperienced guys tasked with achieving something otherworldly. But it substitutes fantasy in place of ghosts. This allows it to fall squarely into the “the next Ghostbusters” bullseye without being exactly like Ghostbusters.
So why hasn’t it been made? I don’t know. I once spoke with a prominent director who looked into making it and he told me there were too many people attached due to lapsing rights and a new team coming on and then that team leaving then a new team coming on. So it had eight million people attached to it. It gets hard to make a movie when you have that many people who have a say and that many people you have to pay.
Still, this seems like such a slam dunk to me, I’m surprised it’s still languishing in Development Hell. I mean, with all these Streamers now in the picture, you would think it’d be a drop in the bucket to commit $150 million to the film. All Apple has to do is announce a new iPhone and they’ll have that money in five minutes. Five minutes gets you the next Ghostbusters!
Getting back to the original question I posed above – about how the bar has gotten so low – I’m sure many of you are frustrated that you continue to struggle. “If Hollywood is so comfortable with average,” you’re probably thinking, “how come my average (or slightly above average) screenplay isn’t getting noticed? Shouldn’t what I’m writing be good enough for their low bar? My script is certainly better than The Kissing Booth 2.”
And this is where aspiring screenwriters get it wrong. You don’t get noticed by writing something just as average as that average film you saw last week. Hollywood doesn’t reward, “I can do that too” writing. They only notice when somebody is above and beyond the other writers.
Think about it. Let’s say you’re in fashion. And you’re standing in a crowd of other fashion hopefuls. If you’re dressed like them, why would anybody notice you? The only way to be noticed is to dress in a way that’s above and beyond what everyone else is wearing.
You have to STICK OUT.
You have to blow people away.
Do it with your voice (Christy Hall). Do it with your concept (Roundtable). Do it with your mythology (Street Rat Allie). Do it with your excellent plotting (Fargo). Do it with your dialogue (Diablo Cody). Write a script that takes advantage of that big strength of yours and then show us why you’re so much better than everyone else.
Because as someone who is currently reading a lot of amateur screenplays, I continue to see the same critical mistake. Writers are aiming for too low of a bar. But it’s even more specific than that. There are two types of people who make this mistake. The first type don’t know any better. They’re newer writers who’ve written less than three screenplays. These writers haven’t gotten enough feedback or studied the industry enough to learn that the goal of a script isn’t to be “just as good” as the lowest common denominator.
The second type, however, do know the bar is higher for those trying to break in. And therefore, they’re the ones I’m worried about. Because if you’ve heard me say this before and you’ve discovered on your own that it’s the case, yet you’re still trying to break in with average material – shame on you. You should know, at this point, that that won’t get you anywhere.
I just finished a screenplay consultation and I only noticed afterward that I had used the phrase, “liked it didn’t love it” in the notes. “Liked it didn’t love it” aren’t bad scripts by any measure. But they’re not what you’re aiming for because it’s rare you’re going to get people interested in “like.” In my experience, people only ever get excited about “love.” And if they do like a “like,” it’s usually not long before they’ve moved onto something else. Cause it’s a lot easier to fall out of like than fall out of love. Just ask all my ex-girlfriends.
I know this all sounds harsh and depressing but don’t think of it that way. All I’m trying to do is be that voice in your head that says, “push harder.” There are so many times I read a scene and I think, “This scene could’ve been so much better if the writer had just pushed themselves.” Cause that attitude of not settling for average is the starting point for success in ANY endeavor. Not just screenwriting.
So keep on writing, my friends. And if you have the next Raiders, Ghostbusters, or Goonies, send it my way. :)
