Is Simon Rich the new Charlie Kaufman?
Genre: Comedy
Premise: A struggling Hollywood director who’s had minimal success gets his first opportunity to direct a studio film. The only problem is the stage where he has to shoot is haunted by an angry silent film actress ghost.
About: Amblin, along with Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World director Edgar Wright, have purchased this short story from Simon Rich, who’s quickly becoming one of the hottest writers in town. Rich’s most recent effort teamed him up with Seth Rogen for HBO Max’s first big feature film, An American Pickle. Like today’s purchase, that too, was based on one of Rich’s short stories. Here’s some storytelling advice from Rich: “When I write a story, the main thing I’m thinking about is, will it be emotionally visceral? Will it grab the reader? Will it make them interested in the characters and make them want to turn the page? That’s the main thing I’m thinking about, more so, even, than whether or not it’s going to be funny.”
Writer: Simon Rich
Details: About 10,000 words. You can read the story yourself here.
What if I told you that Simon Rich is as close to early Charlie Kaufman as any writer has gotten yet? I’m not talking about the 2020 Charlie Kaufman, the guy who thinks characters mumbling to themselves about suicide is a movie concept. But the Charlie Kaufman who took over the independent scene for a good seven years back in the 2000s.
Between American Pickle and Stage 13, Rich has shown he has that particular brand of offbeat humor that echoes Kaufman. The only difference is that his stuff isn’t quite as weird as Kaufman’s was. He leans into the joke more than the weirdness, which makes his stories more funny than unique.
But, make no mistake, this is a weird idea. Rich isn’t writing Kevin Hart vehicles like the rest of the comedy industry (“DMV: Undercover cop David Winston becomes a teller at the DMV to stop a drivers test cheating scam that has allowed thousands of bad drivers to pass their drivers tests!”). He’s actually trying something different. And for that alone, I’m a fan.
By the way, let today’s “horror” short story review act as a reminder that the Horror Showdown deadline is coming up! I’m accepting both horror scripts AND horror short stories. If you want a chance at your script/story getting picked for the Friday, October 16th showdown, send your title, logline, genre (horror or horror adjacent), why we should read your script/story, and a PDF of the screenplay/story to carsonreeves3@gmail.com. All entries must be in by Thursday, October 15th, 8pm Pacific Time!
Yoni is a 30-something aspiring Hollywood director with 95,000 dollars worth of film school debt. Yoni’s been thinking about giving up on his dream for a while now but the one thing that stops him is showing up at his parents’ doorstep and admitting failure, since they told him never to chase the dream in the first place.
But then Yoni receives the call he’s been waiting for. A studio suit tells him they want him to direct their next project. For further details, let’s meet in person. Yoni hurries over to the studio where Nikki greets him. They golf cart their way through the exciting backlot until they make it all the way back to the final sound stage – Stage 13.
The stage looks old and run down because it hasn’t been used in 70 years. It’s actually a relic from the silent film days. When they get inside, Yoni is shocked to see a woman descend from the ceiling. “Who’s that??” Yoni asks. Oh, that’s Clara. She’s a ghost, Nikki says, then darts out, slamming the door behind her.
Long story short, Clara is a pissed off silent film actress who never became famous and has, therefore, been killing crew members who have worked in Stage 13 ever since. The studio believes that if they finally make Clara “a star,” that she’ll be satisfied and leave to heaven, giving them their stage back. So the plan is for Yoni to direct a fake “one-reel” silent film then show up a week later with an early 20th century Variety that says, “Clara becomes a breakout star!”
Yoni is bummed. He’s not even going to be shooting anything. It’s all play acting to trick this dead woman. The studio gives him a script and hires a bunch of actors to play the crew and off we go. But Clara has suspicions almost immediately and since she likes to murder people, Yoni fears for his life. This gives Yoni one last idea. What if they shot a REAL movie and tried to make Clara a REAL star? That would solve all the problems, wouldn’t it? Wouldn’t it…?
I can see why this short story was considered for a film adaptation. A lot of short stories are quick ideas that don’t fall into a typical 3-Act structure. But Stage 13 does. You have the setup. Our main character is thinking of giving up on his directing dream until an opportunity comes along. You have the conflict act, where Yoni doesn’t get to shoot a traditional movie and must deal with the ultimate temperamental actress. And finally, the resolution. Yoni decides to ignore the studio and shoot the movie his way, to disastrous consequences.
I’d say that the only thing different is that the story doesn’t have a “happy” ending. And if you’re a writer who wants to explore the “quirky” “alternative” indie storytelling space, mastery of offbeat endings is a requirement. Usually, counter-culture artists hate the happy ending so much that they give you the negative equivalent. But the negative equivalent is just as cliche. You want to find an ending that isn’t “happy” but is still interesting. And Rich achieves that here.
*spoiler* When Clara finds out that Yoni tricked her, she kills him. So now they’re both stuck in this stage. However, instead of it just being a sad ending, Yoni is now defiantly on board with Clara. He’s going to make it in Hollywood as well, dammit! So the two will work together to become stars. That’s one of the qualities you’re looking for in an offbeat ending. It should feel bittersweet.
Stage 13 is also a good example of how to use character to find your ending as opposed to using plot. With plot endings, it’s often about logistics. Character X has the money. Character Y needs the money. So Character Y comes up with a plan to take the money from Character X. You’ll notice that characters ARE INVOLVED in this scenario. But it’s not a character driven ending.
A character-driven ending is what Rich does in Stage 13. Rich establishes that his hero’s inner conflict is his lack of success and his obsession with finding that success. Ironically, this is the same problem Clara is dealing with. She’s determined to find success as well. So when the ending comes around, it’s not about logistics. Well, I guess there are always going to be logistics involved in an ending. But it’s more about these two characters needing to resolve that conflict within them. They need to show the world that they’re talented and can be successful at their chosen craft.
That’s how you create a character-driven ending. You focus on resolving something INSIDE the character as opposed to OUTSIDE them. And, by the way, character driven endings are almost always more impactful on an audience than plot-driven endings. So it’s worth it to use them if you can.
Like all weird ideas, tone is going to be paramount in making this movie work. But the humor is strong and you’ve got this star-making role in Clara the Angry Ghost. It should be fun. If I were Edgar Wright, this seems way more worthwhile than The Chain. I’d make this first.
[ ] What the hell did I just read?
[ ] wasn’t for me
[x] worth the read
[ ] impressive
[ ] genius
What I learned: In an article with Longreads, Rich was asked how he comes up with such original ideas: “It’s all about finding the right angle, right? Because none of the stories I tell are particularly original, and none of the themes I write about are new, and certainly, hopefully, none of the emotions I’m writing about are unique. So it’s just about coming up with an original creative angle. So with “Sell Out,” I don’t think I’m the first person to wonder what it would be like to meet their ancestors. I mean, there’s hundreds of works of art about it—everything from Back to the Future to Time and Again deals with those issues—so it was just about trial by error, systematically telling the story in every conceivable way until I found one that felt fresh and interesting and honest. Or the story, “Unprotected,” in my last book (note: Unprotected is told from the perspective of a condom). —I mean, how old of a story can you tell? A teenage boy who wants to lose his virginity: It’s the premise behind dozens of popular films. So it was just about, what’s an original, creative and visceral way to tell this old story of a teenage boy trying to get laid?”
