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While watching the press tour for this weekend’s A Silent Place, I noticed that one of the scenes they’re highlighting is (spoiler) when Emily Blunt’s character is forced to have a baby in dead silence. It’s that movie’s “That Scene,” the scene that everybody will be talking about after the movie. The concept of having a “That Scene” is more important than screenwriters realize. One great scene can be the difference between people talking about your movie afterwards or not. And if they’re not talking about it, they aren’t encouraging anybody else to see it. I’m not saying you can have a terrible script with one great scene and you’re saved. But I will say that an average script with a great scene in it could tip the scales and get you a sale. That’s because when a producer reads one great scene and imagines how awesome that scene would be in a theater? They’re willing to work on the rest of the script’s problems JUST SO they can get that scene in a movie.
The late Blake Snyder famously chronicled how That Scene got him the biggest break of his life – selling a script that nabbed the biggest movie star in the world at the time, Sylvester Stallone. The script, “Stop Or My Mom Will Shoot,” is about a tough cop who’s frail mother comes to stay with him. Snyder tells the story of how the producer thought the script was okay. But when he read the scene where the mom is at the wheel during a car chase and won’t go over 20 miles per hour, he knew he had a movie. It was Stop Or My Mom Will Shoot’s That Scene.
Now when I talk about That Scene, I don’t mean your big payoff scene. The big payoff scene is the scene where everything that’s been set up beforehand climaxes in one giant super-scene. A good example of this is the “It’s not your fault” scene in Good Will Hunting. In that movie, Will Hunting’s inner battle is built around repressing the memories of his abusive father. That’s what Sean (Robin Williams) is trying to get to the heart of in their therapy sessions. When Sean tells Will that his dad abusing him isn’t his fault, Will finally breaks down. “It’s not your fault,” Sean keeps repeating, with Will finally letting it all out. “It’s not your fault.” It’s a great scene, but it’s not That Scene. That Scene in Good Will Hunting is the showdown with the preppy Harvard prick at the bar which culminates in, “How do ya like them apples?”
So how do write one of these scenes? I’ve been thinking about this a lot. “A Quiet Place” is a good place to start, since it has the clearest path towards finding its That Scene. So the first thing you want to do is you want to ask, “What can I do with my concept that NO OTHER MOVIE CAN DO?” The reason you want to ask this question is because you’ll be more likely to find an original scene. A Quiet Place has such a specific concept (if the family makes a noise, the monsters can locate and kill them) that finding an original scene to take place inside that concept isn’t as difficult as if you were writing, say, The Post.
The other question you want to ask when trying to write a great scene is, “What’s the worst thing I can do to my character here?” If you can combine those two things in a clever way, you can come with a That Scene. So with A Quiet Place, you’d ask, what’s the worst thing I can do to a character in a situation where they can’t make a sound? And the answer to that question would be… duh duh duhhhh, force them to give birth! Of course, that idea is great in hindsight but probably tougher to come up with in the writing stage. What if, for example, in an early draft, the mother wasn’t pregnant? It’d be hard to think of having a baby. You’d need to come up with the pregnancy idea first before that idea came to you. This is why writing is hard. Sometimes the answers are two ideas away instead of one. And you can’t always see two steps ahead.
But then we move over to “How Do You Like Them Apples” and the same rules don’t quite apply. With that said, the first rule is still in play. What’s a scene that we could ONLY write into this movie? We’ve got a tough-as-nails genius janitor. What if he had a run-in with a bully Harvard student at a bar? A student who tries to display how much smarter he is than this townie, but the townie schools him? That fits the bill as a scene that’s specific to this concept. So it works! It also shows us that we don’t always have to apply the “what’s the worst thing I can do to my character” rule to still get “That Scene.”
Another way to create That Scene is by setting it up. But a “That Scene” needs a bit more firepower, so one setup won’t do it. You’ll need multiple setups and a payoff that’s humongous! The best recent example of this occurs in Spider-Man: Homecoming, when Peter Parker shows up to pick up his prom date, only to find out that her father is… the Vulture. You can see that this also applies the “What’s the worst thing I can do to my hero” rule. What’s the worst thing you can do to someone picking up their first love? Make their father your super-hero nemesis! It’s also pretty specific to the concept. You can only do something like this in a super-hero film.
Sicario is another reminder, however, that simply asking what you can do with your concept that nobody else can do can lead to a That Scene. The scene that still stands out to me when I read that script was the border shootout. Think about it. You’re writing a movie about Mexican drug cartels bleeding over the border into the U.S. In retrospect, it seems obvious that you’d want a scene to occur right at the border. Screenwriter Sheridan then asks, “What’s the worst thing I can do to these characters?” Have them get stuck in that border traffic buildup, and surround them on all sides with Cartel members who want to kill them. I’d never read a scene like that before.
Maybe the best version of giving us a scene that ONLY that concept could provide was the opening scene in Raiders of the Lost Ark. We see our archeologist hero do what he does best – secure treasure in a booby-trapped cave. What’s cool about this scene is that it’s one continuous series of “What’s the worst thing I can do to my hero?” moments. Every step of the way, something is trying to stop him from succeeding. Which is what makes the scene so exciting. The totality of Indy overcoming all these obstacles secures it in the That Scene pantheon.
To finish off, let’s look at the biggest That Scene of them all: the shower scene in Psycho. Here’s why I – at least partly – think that this scene is still talked about 60 years later. It takes the “What’s the worst thing I can do to my hero” rule further than it’s ever been taken before. They literally KILL the hero. The shock of that, combined with how brutal the murder itself is, is what made the shower scene a THAT SCENE.
So, to summarize, to find That Scene, you want to use one or both of these rules. 1) Give us a scene that could only happen inside your specific concept. 2) Ask, “What’s the worst thing I could do to my character at this moment?” Finally, you have to be creative. Sometimes the answer is right in front of you. But other times it’s two ideas ahead, like in A Quiet Place. So play around with some ideas, write a scene a few different ways, to find that magical moment that creates That Scene. Oh, and there’s no reason why you can’t have multiple That Scenes in your script. My favorite movie from last year, Good Time, has half-a-dozen That Scenes. But let’s start with one. Whatever script you’re working on now, spend a day trying to come up with a That Scene for it. Good luck!
Feel free to share your favorite That Scenes in the comments, along with why you think they became so iconic.
Genre: Drama
Premise: (from Black List) A passenger and her cab driver reminisce about their relationships on the way from the airport to her apartment in New York.
About: Today’s screenplay finished NUMBER THREE OVERALL on last year’s Black List. The writer, while a newbie to the screenwriting world, does have two stage plays under her belt. That’s not surprising, since this script feels very much like a play and very much “New York.” I wouldn’t be surprised if Daddio also started as a play and Hall decided to transform it into a screenplay mid-draft. The script already has its female star in Daisy Ridley, who you all know as Rey in the new Star Wars movies.
Writer: Christy Hall
Details: 114 pages
Everyone who’s read this script and reported back to me has been underwhelmed. And I think I know why. There is NOTHING like this script anywhere. The whole story takes place in a cab, focusing on a conversation between an attractive female passenger and an attractive male cab driver, yet it’s NOT a romantic comedy. (spoiler) In fact, there’s no romance whatsoever. Nobody gets together with each other in the end. It’s just two people talking.
It’s for that reason that I found this script fascinating. I’ve never read anything like it. A single location male-female two-hander without romance that’s a drama?? You know what’s funny? This is exactly how the original Pretty Woman script started out. As a drama about a businessman who hires a prostitute for a week. It was the studio who decided to turn it into a romantic comedy. Could the same thing happen here?
Girlie (whose age is never mentioned but she’s around 30) has just landed back in New York City. She’s got a tough New York exterior with a distant hint of Southern hospitality. And right now she needs to catch a cab into the city.
Her cab driver, Clark, is a man’s man. In his 40s, he’s got a tough blue collar handsomeness about him. And you can tell he’s one of those cab drivers who likes to talk. For the first ten minutes, however, he’s stuck glimpsing at a distracted Girlie in the mirror, looking for any opportunity to open up the Conversation Shop.
Girlie, meanwhile, keeps glancing at a text conversation. Someone named “L” misses her. Can’t wait to see her. It’s hard to read how Girlie feels about this. She texts him back, but each text is neutral, the kind you can’t quite read. After awhile, she sours on the activity and Clark strikes, asking her what her deal is.
Girlie needs the distraction, and finds Clark funny. He’s one of those guys that when he starts talking, he doesn’t shut up. And the music of his endless monologues seems to calm Girlie. As Clark notices Girlie occasionally going back to that text conversation, he makes the correct assumption that the man texting Girlie is married.
What follows is a surprisingly honest discussion about how Girlie got into this relationship, and how all of her life choices up to this point probably led her here. Clark gets into the action too, admitting to a life that’s been less than fruitful – I mean, he’s driving a cab in his 40s for God’s sake. But he seems happy enough now. And part of him wants Girlie to be happy too at the end of this ride. Can it happen? Probably not. But he’s going to give it his best shot.
So a lot of you have told me that this script was lame, that it’s just two people talking. But as someone who reads more amateur scripts than anyone, I’m here to tell you that you could learn a thing or two from the dialogue in Daddio.
The first thing I noticed about the dialogue was how natural it was. Usually, in screenwriting, when scenes are 2-3 pages long, the dialogue needs to be laser focused. You have to get out any necessary exposition. Each character has to get to the point quickly so the scene doesn’t lag. It’s why so many screenplay conversations feel unnatural.
But Daddio is one long scene. This allows Hall to let the characters riff for longer than characters would normally do so, which, in turn, makes them sound more like real people. Because that’s how it is in real life. If you meet with someone at a coffee shop, you can chat each other up and the next thing you know, 30 minutes has gone by. Daddio found a conceptual loophole that allows it to get that same realism.
There’s some other things going on with the dialogue as well. The two characters have completely different speech patterns. Clark rambles on endlessly. Girlie chooses her words carefully. One of the best ways to write good dialogue is to create contrast in speech patterns between characters.
In addition to this, Clark swears a lot. Girlie never swears. Clark descends into slang a lot. Girlie speaks in proper English all the time. All of these things bring life to the interactions. To convey just how important this is, I was watching that Adam Devine Netflix Comedy that ripped off the Groundhog Day premise. In that movie, him and the girl sound like the exact same people. Their jokes are similar. Their speech patterns are similar. It makes their interactions less interesting.
On the structural end, whether Hall planned this or not, the film has a perfect ticking time bomb – the end of the ride. We know things are coming to an end when he drops her off. And even though there’s no true goal to the story (other than Clark trying to get Girlie to see that she shouldn’t be with this man), there’s a pervasive anxiety underneath the ride since we know it’s going to end soon. In other words, this movie doesn’t work if it’s set in a static location. The car ride is everything.
Another thing to keep in mind is that Daddio is a spec-friendly idea. It’s two characters, a car, and a destination. These are very easy to read scripts. Just like Beast (which I reviewed in the Newsletter). Just like this weekend’s The Quiet Place. Simple stories that don’t require a reader to keep notes. While I’ll still say to write the best idea you got, it improves your chances of getting more reads if the script is easy to read. Which Daddio is.
Finally, I applaud the writer for giving me an unexpected reading experience. Once I realized that I had no idea where this was going, I gained a lot of respect for the writer and allowed myself to be taken away. For example, our texter, “L,” is introduced as this scumbag who only cares about fucking Girlie. Naturally, then, Clark is going to be the good guy, right? The romantic? The guy Girlie SHOULD be with? NOPE! As the story progresses, it turns out Clark is even worse than the guy she’s texting! And that’s the rest of the script, too. Pretty much all the major beats you expect from a setup like this? The script goes in another direction.
And that leads me to my final FINAL thought. While I DID like the unexpected journey, I didn’t like where the journey ended. It made me feel like… not that I wasted 2 hours… but that more of a climax was needed. There’s a desire from some writers to stay as true to life as possible. And this is VERY true to life. But you gotta make us feel like we came all this way for something. And if that means tweaking the ending so it’s a little more “Hollywood,” I think you’ve got to do it. You never want anybody leaving the theater going, “That’s it?” And I’m afraid that’s what’s going to happen here.
[ ] What the hell did I just read?
[ ] wasn’t for me
[x] worth the read
[ ] impressive
[ ] genius
What I learned: Beware the lure of “indie street cred” choices. These are choices that get you credit with industry folks. But that leave real moviegoers confused and frustrated. That frustration means bad word-of-mouth and a quick box office death. (spoiler) I’m not saying that Clark and Girlie had to end up together here. But the ending needed to be a lot bigger. For example, I thought Girlie was going to be dropped off at L’s house and we were going to have a 3-way final talk between these characters. Instead, Girlie is dropped off at her own house. And that’s it. That’s it??
Are you trying to sell a script? Do you want to make the Black List? Then today’s article is for you! I’ll be going through each and every major genre and break down how likely it is to sell a script or make the Black List in that genre. This is not meant as an end-all be-all determination for what you should write. There is no 100% sure-fire formula for writing a script. But you do want to load the odds up in your favor. All genres will be rated on a scale of 1-10 in the two categories, 10 being the highest and 1 being the lowest. Spec sales are hard to come by so don’t expect any 9s or 10s in that category. But you can still sell a spec in the right genre. Let’s take a look…
Genre: Super-Hero
Script Sale: 1 out of 10
Black List: 1 out of 10
Comps: Black Panther, The Dark Knight, Avengers: Infinity War
Breakdown: There’s no point writing in this genre unless you’re adapting from something else that was successful in another medium. I suppose if you did an action-comedy type thing with it, like Will Smith’s “Hancock,” that could work. But generally speaking, the super-hero genre is strictly an IP zone. Screenwriters should steer clear of it at all costs.
Genre: Contained Thriller (Horror)
Script Sale: 8 out of 10
Black List: 5 out of 10
Comps: 10 Cloverfield Lane, Get Out, Saw
Breakdown: Welcome, my friends, to the most lucrative genre for spec screenwriters and filmmakers. Contained horror is cheap to produce. Horror audiences don’t require much from the genre other than to be scared. You’re not going to get a million dollar paycheck writing in this genre. But your chances of selling one of these is better than in any other genre on this list.
Genre: Contained Thriller (Sci-Fi)
Script Sale: 7 out of 10
Black List: 3 out of 10
Comps: Alien, Ex-Machina, Primer
Breakdown: These movies don’t do as well at the box office as horror, which is why their numbers are lower. They’re also more expensive to make than contained horror. Your best bet is probably to mix the two, like they did with the original Alien.
Genre: Romantic Comedy
Script Sale: 3 out of 10
Black List: 4 out of 10
Comps: How to be Single, Love Simon
Breakdown: This is how bad the romantic comedy has gotten. One of the biggest romantic comedies of 2016, “Why Him,” didn’t even focus on the romantic relationship. It focused on the hero and the romantic interest’s father. With that said, I think I saw a romantic comedy on last year’s Black List for the first time in a long time (Daddio?). So maybe there’s hope. Here’s my take on the romantic comedy. Someone needs to do with the rom-com what Christopher Nolan did with the super-hero movie when he made The Dark Knight. Cut out all this goofy wish- fulfillment nonsense and make it more realistic.
Genre: Action-Comedy
Script Sale: 7 out of 10
Black List: 2 out of 10
Comps: The Spy Who Dumped Me, Central Intelligence
Breakdown: I consider the Action-Comedy to be a hidden gem for spec sales. Hollywood has always loved making these movies. Unlike the straight comedy, which has fallen in recent years because it doesn’t travel well, any sort of action plays well to international audiences. So Hollywood has shifted their priorities over to this genre from the comedy, despite the fact that they cost more to make.
Genre: Western
Script Sale: 5 out of 10
Black List: 7 out of 10
Comps: Bone Tomahawk, Hostiles, The Homesman
Breakdown: This is a tricky genre. At first glance, it seems antiquated. Yet they continue to make 3-4 Westerns a year. I think the reason for this is that directors love to shoot them and actors love to be in them. There’s something inexorably cool about playing a gunslinger or getting that classic wide shot of the old country. You just can’t go crazy when you write these. Nobody’s making big budget Westerns anymore. The ideal setup would be something like “High Noon” where everything is localized (aka “cheap”).
Genre: Period (War)
Script Sale: 6 out of 10
Black List: 7 out of 10
Comps: Braveheart, Saving Private Ryan, Dunkirk, Hacksaw Ridge
Breakdown: When I say “Period War,” I mean any war dating back 2000 years. From the 300 Spartans to the Iraq War. War always sells. There’s something visceral about it that speaks to audiences on multiple levels. But these days, your war film MUST BE BASED ON A TRUE STORY. Otherwise don’t bother. The only reason this gets a 6 on the “sale” rating instead of a “7” is because these movies are expensive to make. So studios have to think a little harder before pulling the trigger.
Genre: Zombie
Script Sale: 5 out of 10
Black List: 3 out of 10
Comps: Train to Busan, Maggie, 28 Days Later
Breakdown: Five years ago, the zombie genre would’ve been a good 2-3 points higher. But the genre is currently in an ice age. Luckily, ice ages only last five years in Hollywood, which means it’s only a matter of time before the zombie pic comes back to life! You like that? “Back to life?” Ah, I kill myself. Then I re-animate myself. Just remember to always ALWAYS try to reinvent this genre. If your zombie script is anything like what I’ve seen in the past, I’m throwing it in the trash. And so is every other reader in Hollywood.
Genre: Romance
Script Sale: 3 out of 10
Black List: 5 out of 10
Comps: Call Me By Your Name, The Notebook, Dear John
Breakdown: This is the least glorious of the genres. Nobody remembers who wrote or directed these movies. But there’s definitely a market for them. Unfortunately, for right now, that market is dominated by Nicholas Sparks, and, to a lesser extent, John Green. It’s not a spec-friendly genre, which means you should probably steer clear of it. Self-publish a novel instead.
Genre: Comedy
Script Sale: 5 out of 10
Black List: 3 out of 10
Comps: Father Figures, Daddy’s Home, Bad Moms
Breakdown: Like I said above, if you’re going to write a comedy, I’d suggest writing an action-comedy. But you can still sell a straight comedy. Right now, the trend for a sale has three branches. 1) Make it female-centric. 2) Go with an age old situation that has built-in conflict (a step-father being forced to co-parent with the real father). Or 3) Pick whatever the latest trendy tech thing is and write about that (those two Uber comedy spec sales from a couple of years ago are an example). The nice thing about this genre is that the big name comedy actors have cut their fees, so comedies can be made for cheap. That means there are still sales to be had!
Genre: Biopic
Script Sale: 8 out of 10
Black List: 10 out of 10
Comps: The Founder, Catch Me If You Can, The Imitation Game
Breakdown: This genre is right up there with Contained Horror as the most lucrative on the list. The reason being that this is the last outlet where movie stars can still be movie stars, as opposed to cogs in a machine. Also, as long as you can spell, your biopic will make The Black List.
Genre: Period
Script Sale: 1 out of 10
Black List: 5 out of 10
Comps: The Other Boleyn Girl, Victoria and Abdul, Love in the Time of Cholera, Tulip Fever, The Danish Girl
Breakdown: If you’re writing a period piece that isn’t associated with war, do so at your own risk. These movies make less than no money. Even the ones that get a boost from Oscar noms rarely do well. On the plus side, these movies do okay in the UK, on the Black List, and in the Nicholl Competition. So if you love these stories, there are outlets for you. But these are some of the toughest pitches in the business. You’ll get 1/1000 of the read requests than had you written a contained horror film. If I was a producer and someone pitched me a story set in the 17th century where an artist and his lover invested in the tulip business, I might just shoot myself right there.
Genre: Sci-Fi Fantasy
Script Sale: 0 out of 10
Black List: 1 out of 10
Comps: Star Wars, Jupiter Ascending, Avatar
Breakdown: This genre is a death-trap. It’s the most expensive genre to produce. The sprawling nature of these stories and their enormous character counts are the exact opposite of what screenplays do well. Don’t bother defending why the sci-fi fantasy script you’re working on is different. This is the one genre I can say, without knowing anything about your script, that if you’re working on one, STOP. You’re wasting your time.
Genre: Horror
Script Sale: 7 out of 10
Black List: 4 out of 10
Comps: It, The Conjuring
Breakdown: With the emergence of “It,” the straight horror film (not contained) is harder to gauge. Hollywood hates spending money on horror since the formula has proven for so long that you don’t need to. But 700 million worldwide is a quick way to change opinions. We also have to remember that these bigger budget horror flicks are based on IP. With that said, I think a good horror script, regardless of whether it’s contained or not, can sell. I also think big-budget horror is about to blow up. So better get on the trend early than late.
Genre: Action
Script Sale: 7 out of 10
Black List: 6 out of 10
Comps: John Wick, The Fast and the Furious, The Bourne Identity, Taken, Die Hard
Breakdown: Straight action plays EVERYWHERE. Everywhere, guys. Nobody needs subtitles for it. So studios are desperate to find that next great action property. They usually get it from books (fifth-tier versions of James Bond). But this is one of the few genres still open for spec screenwriters to create something on their own. They’re expensive to produce, so a sale isn’t guaranteed. But I don’t see this genre dying out… well… ever.
Genre: Drama
Script Sale: 3 out of 10
Black List: 7 out of 10
Comps: Three Billboards, Suburbicon, Room
Breakdown: This is a unique category because on the surface, you don’t want to mess with it. The genre requires more skill to pull off than any other genre. You have to rely strictly on great storytelling and strong character development, which most writers don’t master for a decade or more. A bad drama script is a script reader’s nightmare. Wrought with melodrama and cliched story beats, it’s the reading equivalent of Hell. With that said, these movies win studios Oscars. So studios are always going to be intrigued by them. It’s for this reason that if you write a drama, your aim should be to make The Black List and get the film made as opposed to secure that big flashy script sale.
Genre: Sci-Fi
Script Sale: 5 out of 10
Black List: 3 out of 10
Comps: The Matrix, Source Code, The Martian, Inception, Ready Player One
Breakdown: Straight sci-fi is fun but it’s such an expensive genre and it’s competing directly with such a juggernaut of a genre (Super-Hero) that it’s hard to get a studio to bite on non-IP material. The Black List doesn’t really like them either. If you like sci-fi, I’d write something in the time-travel or “time-travel adjacent” genre (like Source Code), where you can create a big premise for a smaller price tag.
Genre: Faith-Based
Script Sale: 6.5 out of 10
Black List: Negative 8 out of 10
Comps: Heaven is For Real, The Shack, I Can Only Imagine
Breakdown: I don’t know much about this genre. But I do know the faith-based market is coming of age. And if you’re a screenwriter looking to make a living, there’s no reason you shouldn’t take advantage of that. It seems like a lot of these movies are based on books, but as long as you convey a positive message in your script about doing the right thing, and wrap it inside a good idea, there’s no reason to think you can’t sell your screenplay. Also, if a writer can figure out how to subvert the overtly melodramatic tendencies of these scripts so that they can cross over, they’ll become extremely wealthy. Unfortunately, the Black List’s “No Conservatives Allowed” policy means you’ll have to wave goodbye to any Black List aspirations.
Genre: Fantasy
Script Sale: 1 out of 10
Black List: 5 out of 10
Comps: The Lord of the Rings, Harry Potter, The BFG
Breakdown: The only reason this genre isn’t at zero is that it’s a little more accessible than sci-fi fantasy. Still, this genre is built exclusively off of IP, usually books. I occasionally see fantasy scripts hit the Black List (A Monster Calls) but if you have a great fantasy idea, it’s highly advisable that you write a novel instead of a screenplay.
Genre: Action-Adventure
Script Sale: 4.5 out of 10
Black List: 2 out of 10
Comps: Indiana Jones, Jurassic World, Pirates of the Caribbean
Breakdown: This is a weird genre because it SHOULD be a great outlet for spec screenwriters. It seems to be open for new ideas. And the family-friendly aspect of the genre means that they’ll play to anybody. That’s the main reason a movie as average as Jurassic World can make 1.6 billion dollars. I suppose that when movies in a genre start making that much money, studios are more likely to look for previous success in other mediums than buy a spec. Still, something tells me that a writer who comes up with the next Indiana Jones could quickly find themselves on the front page of the trades.
Genre: Dark Comedy
Script Sale: 2 out of 10
Black List: 8 out of 10
Comps: Ingrid Goes West, Me Earl and The Dying Girl, Little Miss Sunshine, Fargo
Breakdown: There’s a lot of crossover with Drama here. Dark Comedy is a really tough genre to master. But, when done well, it could put you in the Oscar race. So it can’t be dismissed completely. With that said, these movies rarely make money. Even the good ones. There’s one every five years that becomes a mega-hit but other than that, there are hundreds of dark comedies that are never seen or heard from again. The good news is, the Black List looooooves dark comedies. It’s probably their favorite genre behind biopics. And if your script makes the list, there’s a 50/50 chance it’ll get made into a movie.
Genre: Straight Thriller
Script Sale: 6 out of 10
Black List: 3 out of 10
Comps: Gone Girl, Buried, The Girl on the Train, The Circle, The Gift
Breakdown: There’s some natural crossover between Thrillers and Action-Thrillers. So to distinguish the two, I see straight Thrillers as more real-world based and suspense-driven. In the past we may have called them Hithcockian Thrillers. These movies aren’t as lucrative as horror, but there’s a market for them for sure. If you’re going to write a thriller, try to have a really clever concept and one great twist. Those two things make these reads a lot more memorable, which increases the chance of a sale exponentially.
Genre: Family
Script Sale: 5 out of 10
Black List: 1 out of 10
Comps: Night at the Museum, Goosebumps, The Goonies
Breakdown: The reason this gets a slight nod on the script sale chart over the more mature Action-Adventure is because I know that Hollywood has been spending 25 years now looking for the next Goonies. Which means they’re willing to buy good family scripts. And let’s not forget that Night at the Museum was a spec sale as well. And that spawned a huge franchise.
Genre: Musicals
Script Sale: 2 out of 10
Black List: 6 out of 10
Comps: La La Land, The Greatest Showman, A Star is Born
Breakdown: The simple fact is that these movies tend to be either director driven (La La Land) or studio driven (The Greatest Showman). They rarely, if ever, are driven by a screenwriter. And the reason for that is simple: it’s hard to imagine songs on a page. With that said, the few times I’ve seen this work are when a writer tries something really zany. Like a zombie musical. Or a post-apocalyptic musical. So it can be done. It’s just rare.
There you have it. Now get to arguing in the comments!
Carson does feature screenplay consultations, TV Pilot Consultations, and logline consultations. Logline consultations go for $25 a piece or 5 for $75. You get a 1-10 rating, a 200-word evaluation, and a rewrite of the logline. I highly recommend not writing a script unless it gets a 7 or above. All logline consultations come with an 8 hour turnaround. If you’re interested in any sort of consultation package, e-mail Carsonreeves1@gmail.com with the subject line: CONSULTATION. Don’t start writing a script or sending a script out blind. Let Scriptshadow help you get it in shape first!
I’m always on the lookout for the next big thing.
What’s coming around the corner that has the potential to be a new outlet for screenwriters?
Lots of people have been talking about virtual reality as the next big thing. I think that’s – pardon the language, but – bullshit. We’re 25 years out from those first rudimentary VR demonstrations and many of the same problems exist.
Here’s what I think the next potential REALISTIC avenue for screenwriters is: PODCASTS
I’m not talking about podcasts ABOUT screenwriting. I’m talking about using podcasts as a fictional storytelling medium. Because here’s the biggest problem facing screenwriters as I see it: IT’S HARD TO GET NOTICED. You somehow have to convince somebody that your words on a page – WORDS ON A PAGE! – are good enough to buy, to invest tens of millions of dollars in, to spend the next five years of your life with. This is why everyone chooses intellectual property over words on a page. Seeing that something has worked in a previous medium is a nice insurance package in a business which is, at its heart, a gamble.
This is why I tell screenwriters that if you’re at all interested in directing, direct your own script. It is, bar none, the fastest way to establish yourself in this business. You don’t have to wait for person after person to approve your script until it gets to the last guy on the chain, two years after you started sending it out in the first place, to get that, “Sure, yeah, okay.”
Instead, you become your own personal greenlight. No yeses required.
Unfortunately, the barrier for entry in filmmaking is high. It’s expensive as hell to make a film. Even if you wanted to direct your own stuff, you’d have to raise the money to do so. Seeing stories like this guy’s doesn’t exactly instill confidence in the process.
That’s what I like about this podcasting idea. The barrier for entry is INSANELY LOW. All you need is a script, a microphone, a few actors, and you’re in.
But what I really like about podcasting is that nobody has cracked the fiction space yet. There hasn’t been a “Serial.” And Serial should be great motivation. While everyone else in the podcast space was interviewing D-list celebrities, Serial came up with something that wasn’t just unique, it inspired an entire genre on the format. You can’t kick a stone these days without hitting a true crime podcast.
This means that whoever cracks fictional podcasting first? Becomes a sensation. You get all the press. All the adulation. Everyone loves the pioneer, the guy or gal who managed to open the pickle jar. And because of this, I guarantee. GUARANTEE. That whoever creates that first breakout hit, gets a movie deal out of it. That’s something to keep in mind. Everyone in Hollywood wants stuff based on IP.
Well, once you produce your podcast, you’ve got your IP.
Don’t get me wrong, there have been some attempts at fictional podcasts. High profile even. Believe it or not, there’s a fictional podcast out there with Oscar Isaac playing one of the leads. It’s called Homecoming. Unfortunately, it’s bad. And I’m not surprised. This is a new medium, which means there are going to have to be some stumbles before somebody learns how to sprint. But to show you how desperate people are for this medium to produce something, even that show managed to get an Amazon order for its next season.
The question then becomes, how do you write for a fictional podcast? Well, I think we can look at the failure of Homecoming to see how NOT to write one. Homecoming is billed as a “conspiracy thriller” and formats itself similar to a TV show you might find on AMC. And therein lies the problem. Podcasts are not TV. Whenever you’re writing for a medium, you have to ask, “What are the strengths and weaknesses of this medium?” In writing a play, for example, you have a limited number of characters and a limited number of locations. So a lot of emphasis is placed on dialogue. In film, however, which is a more visual medium, you try and convey things through what the audience can see as opposed to hear.
Since nobody’s written a great fictional podcast show yet, we don’t know the answer to what works and what doesn’t. But that’s the exciting part. You can be creative. You can try things. You can, for example, set up a “faux interview-type podcast” that, on the surface, feels like every other podcast out there, then spin it into a horror film when something goes wrong during a recording session. Ironically, your best bet may be to go back to the old radio days to find inspiration. Remember that one of the most famous figures in Hollywood history, Orson Welles, became famous for his radio telecast of the War of the Worlds. And that was just a guy talking.
By the way, I’m not saying you can’t tell a traditional story on a podcast. Good stories will work on any medium. I’m just thinking that to get that media buzz, the first breakthrough fictional podcast will need to be inventive in some way. Maybe each podcast is a series of interviews from old tapes found in a psychiatric ward. No context given. Each conversation gets progressively freakier. That’s off the top of my head and probably too obvious of an idea. But hopefully it gets the creative juices flowing.
My point is that you could have something WRITTEN and PRODUCED for the world to experience in… less than a week. That’s how low the barrier for entry is here. So, if this interests you, start kicking around some ideas in the comments section. Brainstorm. Maybe a few of you can work together to create something awesome. I’d rather it be a Scriptshadow reader who makes the big podcast breakthrough than some rando. Let’s get to it!
Genre: TV Pilot – Period
Premise: At the beginning of the 17th century, an English sailor washes up on the shores of Japan, which is on the verge of civil war.
About: Shogun was written in 1970 and was turned into a mini-series in 1980. A new version of the show has been off and on in development since 2010. More recently, after the success of Game of Thrones, FX has decided to take a crack at it. Today’s screenwriter, Ronan Bennett, has a bit of a controversial past. He’s endured two stints in prison for participating in a Republican Army bank robbery, although it was ultimately decided that he was wrongly convicted.
Writer: Ronan Bennett (based on the novel by James Clavell)
Details: 60 pages, April 26, 2017 draft
I’ve tried to read this book several times as it’s one of the highest rated books ever on Amazon. All in all, I’ve foraged through about 200 pages. It’s hard to give those pages a rating. The book’s biggest strength is also its biggest weakness: its obsession with detail.
A good story makes you believe you’re in that time and place, and the level of detail here achieves that, providing a richness and authenticity that even the best historical fiction writers would struggle to match. But the more detail you add, the slower your plot moves, and that was why I could never finish the book. I needed more to happen.
With that said, it’s fertile ground for a TV adaptation. The focus on detail as opposed to plot gives any writer wanting to tackle the material an endless trove of information to build a story around.
And while the lack of fantasy elements may prevent FX from creating what they really want out of Shogun, which is their own Game of Thrones, there are still some cool toys to play with. I mean, who doesn’t like samurais?
So I’m hopeful that a show can be cobbled together out of this. Let’s see if I’m right.
The year is 1600. Englishman John Blackthorne, the pilot of a trade ship, has just washed up on a mysterious foreign shore. Clinging to life, he’s rescued by the locals, who nurse him back to health at a nearby village. When he wakes up, he learns where he is: The Japans.
Blackthorne is shocked. You see, the 1600s were some really rudimentary times in the seafaring trade. Deep sea navigation was near impossible unless you were traveling popular routes like England to France. The Japans were like Atlantis to European sailors. Only a few had ever found it. And even those who had were unconvinced they could find it again.
As soon as Blackthorne can get up, he sets out to find his crew, but learns that this strange land has a set of customs unlike any in Europe. The psychotic leader of the village, Omi, beheads one of his own men right in front of Blackthorne for not bowing low enough. Hmmm, maybe Blackthorne should play it cool until he figures this place out.
Meanwhile, we jump inland where the emperor of Japan, or “The Taiko,” is dying. There are 5 main provinces in Japan at the time, all led by different men. It’s well-known that the Taiko’s death will provoke a war between these provinces to become the next Taiko, so the Taiko invites all these leaders together in the hopes of finding a leader before that happens.
Back at the village, Blackthorne demands to see his crew, who he learns are being held captive in a pit. When he rejoins them, he’s told by the locals that one of them will be killed tonight, and that the group must decide who that’s going to be. There seems to be a complicated past between Blackthorne and his crew built upon this most recent mission. So that conversation is far from a happy one.
While at first we’re rooting for Blackthorne and his crew to escape these strange savage people, we begin to sense that they’re not exactly angels themselves. This leaves us wondering who we should align ourselves with. And where, exactly, all of this is headed.
For bigger pilots, the Shogun formula is a good one. Part of the pilot should focus on the smaller picture and part of it the big picture. There are two main storylines here. The first is Blackthorne and his crew. He’s got to get his crew and get the hell out of this place. The second is the impending death of the Taiko. This entire country is on the verge of war.
Without the bigger picture (the Taiko), you don’t feel like the smaller picture matters as much. Not only that, but the big picture lets us know there’s tons of ground to cover, that this is an actual SHOW. I read too many pilots so small in scope that you wonder how they’re going to get past episode 5. I mean, we meet the leaders of all five provinces in Shogun. The places we can potentially go and people we can potentially meet in those provinces is endless.
Shogun also institutes another popular format for shows like these. A leader is about to die. Who’s going to take his place? This is the perfect starting point for a TV show for a number of reasons, the most obvious of which is that we know “shit is about to get ugly.” And since human beings can’t look away from ugly, you’re probably going to get lots of people tuning back in to see the ugly. And this isn’t limited to period pieces. This is what they did with Fox’s Empire.
So what about the nuts and bolts? What’s good here?
I liked the uncertainty of how dangerous this culture was. It added an extra level of tension to every scene. Once Blackthorne sees that you can be killed on the spot for something as trivial as an improper bow, he knows that every interaction going forward will be a tightrope walk. And that’s a dream scenario for a screenwriter. You’re always looking to infuse scenes with tension and conflict beyond the obvious. And that’s exactly what this does.
I also liked the mystery behind Blackthorne’s crew. I don’t remember how they handled this in the book. But here they set it up that Blackthorne presents himself as a trader, but the truth is he may be a pirate. We get these quick flashbacks where his crew is pillaging a wedding. This makes us wonder who these guys really are. And you need a few big questions like that leaving the pilot. If we feel like we’ve already got all our answers, why do we need to tune in for more?
This is the big difference between feature and TV writing. You need to leave threads open and those threads need to be wrapped in mysteries that are actually intriguing.
What Shogun will have to fight against is its incredibly complex mythology. I didn’t count, but I think there were something like 40 people introduced in this pilot. That’s a little less than 1 character per page. Ouch. And while I did my best to summarize the Taiko situation above, the truth is it was so complicated that I could only bastardize the summary. Will audiences be patient enough to sit through all that? Or will they find it to be too specific?
As producer-ish as this note sounds, I’d focus more on samurais and violence, at least early on. Pull people in AND THEN hit them with the intricacies of your mythology. Bore then early and often and they may not stick around for the good stuff.
I liked this pilot. It’s slow. But you can tell there’s many avenues to explore. With that said, I’m wondering if it has the WOW-factor. There are plenty of shows that succeed without the WOW-factor. But it sure makes things easier when you’ve got it. And I’m not convinced Shogun does. We’ll have to see.
[ ] What the hell did I just read?
[ ] wasn’t for me
[x] worth the read
[ ] impressive
[ ] genius
What I learned: The “choose who dies” scene. This scene ALWAYS WORKS. Always. Every time. You put your characters in a situation where they have to choose between themselves which of them must die and it’s always interesting. In this case, the crew must choose someone to be handed to the Japanese for sacrifice.